Why did the man launch his rocket into the sun? He didn't. Overcoming the sun's orbital pull would require your rocket to travel ~7,400,000 mph, which is a velocity that is impossible for today's rockets to reach.

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What did the alchoholic get for his birthday? Nothing. His alchohol abuse split up is family and now he is alone.

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-Knock! Knock! -Who's there? -Bob. Is Brian's here? -Wrong adress. Brian's home is the first one at your right. -Oh sorry. Have a nice day.

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Were you born on a freeway? because thats were all accidents happen.

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Whats round and bouncy? A bouncy ball

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What looks like poo but is rainbow colored? Rainbow colored poo.

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What do you a call a black man in a two piece suit? A respectable citizen, racial profiling is ignorant.

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knock knock There's no door

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How do you start a riot in Mexico? Roll a penny down the street.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Im a Jew, Fart yourself.

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what did the black guy get from churches chicken? fried chicken.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the hospital because his wife has multiple STD's

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WHY DID THE CHICKEN CROSS THE ROAD?

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Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Because she is a woman.

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Roses are red, Violets are rare because of the irreversible damage to our ecosystem in recent years.

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Why didn't the guy have kids? He didn't want them

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What did one apple say to the other apple? -Nothing, apples can't talk

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. I got a brother. He's bigger then you.

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Yo Momma is Like a Prostitute... ...I pay her for sexual intecourse

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what do you get when you cross a dinosaur and a spaceship? a dinosaur spaceship

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What made your girlfriend laugh to death? You dropped my pants.

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Be careful not to say Betelgeuse 3 times, because if you say Betelgeuse 3 times, then Betellllwoow that was close.

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Q: What did Bobby get for his first birthday ? A: Adoption papers

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what did johnny's dad say to him after his baseball game? nothing because johnny's dad was an abusive alcoholic who beat him until the neighbors found out and called the police. the dad was arrested, tried in court then promptly thrown in jail were he was raped in the showers repeatedly by a very large and intimidating black man. he vomited suicide in his cell today by drinking drain cleaner

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops