Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the KFC man was chasing him.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Question: What do you call a Black person who cooks food at a fried chicken restaurant? Answer: A chef

thumb_up thumb_down +3

There once was a man from Nantucket Who got his head stuck in a bucket He yanked and he yowled, he hollered and howled, Then gave up and grumbled, "Aw, I guess I'll have to go to the doctor."

thumb_up thumb_down +3

what would happen if you took all the veins out of your body and laid them out tip to tip? you die

thumb_up thumb_down +3

I'm so stupid that I'm posting on Anti Jokes!

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Once upon of time, there was an ugly duckling. It was so ugly that everyone died. The end.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

yay for the idiot that posted "whats white, sticky and yummy? milk". WTF dude? milk has never been sticky and good at the same time and its never going to be. infact, ive never known milk to be sticky, maybe after such a long period of being spoiled the milk becomes somewhat sticky, but your attempt at creating a perverted joke that wasnt in anyway funny or even close to being correct was so poor i feel the need to post this and hope you read it and decide returning to school would be beneficial to the rest of your life. I guarantee everyone who reads your post about milk being sticky is thinking something pretty similar to what i am.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

two scientists line up a frog at a line and tell it to jump it jumps 4 feet they cut off one front leg and tell it to jump it jumps 4 feet they cut off the other front leg and tell it to jump it jumps 4 feet they cut off a rear leg and tell it to jump it jumps 2 feet they cut off its last leg and tell it to jump it doesn't move they tell it to jump again it doesn't move the scientists come to a conclusion: frogs with no legs...cant hear

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Why was the little boy sad? Both of his parents died in a tragic car accident.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

A dog walks into a bar and the bartender asks him "What can I get for you?" The dog replies "1 beer please." shocked at the dogs English the bartender sprints out of the bar in terror

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Why did the girl fall out of the swing? She was dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

How many apes does it take to put in a light bulb 3

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Why did little Tommy eat an apple? Because he was on a diet

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Haiku's are easy But sometimes they don't make sense Refrigerator

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What's the difference between the Hulk and the Thing? One's green.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Roses are red, violets are blue, some poems rhyme, others don't

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What did Kony say to the children right before he took them Come with me you f******* n*****

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Why did Justin Beiber cut his hair It had grown to long

thumb_up thumb_down +3

A Muslim walks into a bomb shop. Unfortunately for the bomb shop owner, the Muslim was a police officer. He proceeded to arrest the owner and the employees of the store, as it turned out that the selling of these particular explosive devices were illegal. They ended up in jail, and justice was served.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

a gay guy is in a club, from across the room he sees another attractive man with now shirt and he gets an erection.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

How do you get your dog to stop peeing on the floor? SHOOT IT!!!

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Why is the black man in the ghetto? He is a cop and is trying to solve a murder that was committed a couple days ago.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Hitler, Mussilini, And Hideki Tojo Walk In To A Bar Mitzvah, Everyone Was Brutally Murdered & No One Survived.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

roses are red, windows are clear, get off your ass and bring me a beer

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops