I drove my Chevy to the levy. It was dry.

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what do you call a mexican in a coffee shop? a customer and/or worker in the coffee shop.

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Persond A: A guy blows himself and his family up with a hand grenade Person B: HEY!!! Thats not funny thats how my family died

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What did T Pain say to the skipper of his yacht? I'm on a yacht

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What do you call Ed Milliband after he's been decapitated? Dead Milliband.

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A man walks into a bar. The bartender says "why the long face?" He says, "I have acromegaly"

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I popped my head over my sexy neighbour's fence today to see her lying in her bikini. "Wow, you're gorgeous!" I burst out, "I hope you know how to do CPR." "Why?" she asked with a giggle, "Because I've taken your breath away?" "No," I replied. "I've just run your son over out front."

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What did the three sixteen year old boys do to the homeless man late at night? Wished him a happy birthday and gave him a meal

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What's the quickest way to a person's heart? A knife

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A Muslim, a Jew and a Christian are on an airplane talking about religion. The Jew tells the Christian he believes in a single holy entity. The Christian says he believe Christ is the Son of that very same entity. The Muslim says "When can I get out of this room?" because he's been detained at the airport due to religious profiling.

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What's worse than a worm in your apple? Two worms in your apple.

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What did the kid with no arms and no legs get for his birthday? A basketball.

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What hurts more than a bee sting? Child birth.

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How can you tell if a man has an erection? His penis is no longer flaccid

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Once there was a pig named Poga. When he grew up, he was slaughtered and made into bacon.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was a serial rapist.

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I know how to make a brilliant telescope out of an empty jar, some leather, a string and a brilliant telescope.

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why did the chicken cross the road? Because there were no traffic.

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There was once a man named Larry. Larry was an office worker for a paper company. One day when Larry was counting papers he got a papercut on his left hand. Therefore his finger began to bleed as he sat in agony. What did Larry do next? He got up and got a band-aid. Larry continued his paper work at his desk.

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Why was the boy sad? Because he had a frog stapled to his face.

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A Blond and a Brunette are falling down to their deaths, which one hits the ground first? Does it matter? They both die anyway.

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I like touching my boobs

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Q: Who lives in a pineapple under the sea. A: Tsunami victims.

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Hey, I just met you And this is crazy! But here's my switchblade Get in the trunk.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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