A man, a dog and a pregnant woman walked into a bar, the man bought a beer, the dog was put back outside as the pub didn't allow animals and the pregnant woman didn't buy anything alcoholic as she didn't want to risk the life of her unborn child-she had a soda.

a pig ate a hobo, the hobo was a blind rapist from canada

Two corns were decided to get married. In wedding, bridegroom can't find bride, so he asked a popcorn next to him, "Do you know where is the bride?" The popcorn answered, "I just change my hair style."

why did the blonde get caught shop lifting? she wasnt a very good theif

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, it was hit by a bus.

why shouldn't you hit a black guy on a bike? Cause violence is against the law

Why didn't the Mexican have a job? Because stereotypes made employers unjustly reluctant to hire a hard-working, competent man.

Whats white and blue and if it fell out of a tree it would kill you? a fridge in a denim jacket :D

Why can't helen keller drive a car? Because she is a woman

Why did the student fail his test? Because he has AIDS darragh hamilton

Nero, listen, do not try to imply that you created the Iron man method, that was developed by many people over the duration of many years in the former underground society. You seem far too educated to be the savage you claim to be, if I told you that our people will do the uttermost to see if we can fix that eye of yours and succeed, will you forgive my failure and imperfections as a leader? Look at it this way, I am a leader, not a ruler, what my followers do is up to them, but if they cannot understand that they have to pay the consequences behind their actions, they have no place within the order, as for the expression "my order" it is simply what my many followers like for me to say, not because they are unwilling to take responsibility, but as a token of praise. Our articulations and means of expressing desire and such are very much the same, have you ever been part of our order?

What is the difference between a Jew and a pizza? A pizza doesn't scream in the oven

What's the hardest part of rollerblading? Telling your dad you're gay.

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was black.

A man noticed that the sun was coming in brightly through his window. He was trying to take a nap and didnt appreciate the sunlight. He closed the blinds.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To mutilate the body of a dead Jewish girl that lay on the other side. --ZeNaziGermanDoctor

What is the difference between a watermelon and a baby? One's fun to smash and the other is a watermelon.

roses are grey violets are grey im color blind

Whats a difference between an eagle and a tree? They both can fly. Oh yeah, I Iied about the tree.

A drunk walks out of a bar gets in his car and proceeds to drive home the driver passed out at the wheel swerved in the wrong lane and smashed the car of the Jefferson family a young family of 4, the Jefferson family's car exploded into flames while the drunk sat back laughed and rubbed the wound on his head

What does Obama, the President of the United States of America see when he closes his eyes? His eyelids

My dads so gay he has sex with other men for fun.

Knock Knock? Come in.

What did Joe get for his first birthday? Nothing he died at birth

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...