What did the bus say to the short bus? Heh, you're retarded..

What happens when a chemist dies? They are given a proper funeral and buried.

What's the difference between Paris Hilton and a cow? Cows are ruminants, meaning that they have a digestive system that allows use of otherwise indigestible foods by regurgitating and rechewing them as "cud". Paris Hilton, on the other hand, is a human being. Therefore, her stomach digests the bolus (masticated food) only after it has exited the oesophagus into the body of the organ, where it is digested into chyme and then passed through the pyloric sphincter into the duodenum.

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What's old, silver, and smells like old cheese? A fork with old cheese on it.

Why did Sally fall off the swing? Why? She had no Arms or legs Knock knock Whos there? Not Sally XD XD XD XD XD XD XD

Whats the difference between Amanda and Brittaney spears? Nothing, they are both worthless sluts

What's black and white and red all over? A butler with a stab wound.

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Why was the boy sad? I don't know, what do think I am? An umbrella? Why would you even think FOR A MOMENT that it's OK to just ASK me random stuff? Do you have ANY IDEA who I am?! I'm your worst nightmare, and if you ever ask me ANYTHING without permission again, or so help me I will drown the nearest pet goldfish. P.S. His cat died.

How many dead babies does it take to paint a wall? First of all, babies do not have the physical ability or the mental capacity to ever paint a wall, no matter how many of them there are. Second of all, they are dead which probably will not increase their chances of painting said wall.

How many squirrels does it take to change a lightbulb? 42.

Q-what did the bus say to the other bus? A-nothing, buses are incapable of talking

Why was Martha put in a wheelchair? She was hit by a rabid cabbage.

why did the chicken cross the road? to get to your house..... knock knock! whos there? THE CHICKEN!!

An Asian man walks into a bar and ask the Barman for a beer, the Barman is racist and therefore tells the Asian man to leave his pub. The man goes home and drowns his children in the bath and pushes his wife down the stairs, he is found out by the police and is given a life sentence in jail. 5 years later the Barman kills someone in a bar fight and is also sent to jail for life. The Barman meats the Asian man in prison and they settle there differences with a handshake. Two days later the Barman was stabbed in the neck.

What did the homeless man get for his birthday? AIDS

What's blue paint and smells like red paint? Paints

why did the chicen cross the road? because it saw an excellent deal on hair products on the other side of the street.

Roses are red Violets are blue Some poems rhyme This one doesn't.

The snake had no skatebord to put johnnys refrigirator because the bettles mom had stolen the clowns purse were his parking had been for the airplane higway stop.

Nope, I mean you can try, but my phone is busted and the code on the chip my galpal here managed to finally get into the cell, has sixteen digits so damn small that none of us can read it,

What Would George Washington say if he were alive to day. why are all the slaves free?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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