Knock knock Who's There? Woo? Woo who? Stop celebrating and let me in.

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What did the shark say to the beached whale? Nothing.

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Why did Bob stop at the light? Because it was red and not doing so would be illegal.

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A jewish man runs into a wall with an erection. He broke his nose.

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Roses are black, Violets are black, I am blind.

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"hey woody can i ask you a question" "sure buzz" "why is it your name is woody but they use me as a vibrator"

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A Holocaust joke? I did Nazi that coming...Anne, Frankly, I'm quite offended.

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Why can't black people swim? Many of them can. It's racist to assume that.

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Roses are grey Violets are grey I am a dog

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An alphabet walks into the post office and asks for a letter. What does the postal worker give the alphabet? Nothing. Alphabets can't walk.

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How do you fit 100 Jews in a car? You can't

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Why did Kelly lose all interest in men? An aneurysm in her brain popped

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Why did the homosexual cross the road without looking both ways? He was blind......

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"Knock knock," said the guy about to deliver a knock knock joke.

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A man went to the doctor and told him he was having the strangest dream. "First I was a tee pee Then I was a wigwam A tee pee, a wigwam. Do you have any idea what could be wrong?" The doctor looked at the man and said "You have aids."

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what is the only thing in the world that can pick up 1000 jews at once? A vacuum cleaner

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Fuzzy Wuzzy was a bear. Fuzzy Wuzzy had no hair Fuzzy Wuzzy died of cancer

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two hippo's were in the lake. The water was up to their eyes. What did one hippo say to the other? I don't know why but i keep thinking it's tuesday.

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boling water: why is it taking so long for you to get hard? egg: sorry, it's just because i recently got laid by a chick.

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I'm Ryan Dunn, and this is a 120 mph car crash

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Abbie im pretty sure your birth certificate is an apology from the condom factory

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A man walks into a doctors office. The doctor says "I've got good news and bad news. Which do you want to hear first?" The man responds "I'd like to hear the good news." The doctor says "I ran a series of tests and found you have leukemia, but your insurance covered everything." The man hangs his head and tears up as he asks "What's the bad news?" The doctor heads for the door as he answers "Your company is switching to a private insurer and because of your pre-existing condition you're being denied coverage. None of your future treatments or appointments will be paid for." The man snaps his fingers and says "Damn! I should've voted Democrat!"

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What's worse than one bee sting? Two bee stings. What's worse than two bee stings? The Holocaust. What's worse than the Holocaust? Three bee stings.

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The scientists of Cambridge have finally developed a cure for feeling low! They have presented it in the style of a song. See if you can spot the hidden frequency wavelengths when you sing it out lout. They are what make you feel better. You've got to LOVE the world! Be a friend! And when You're down you've got to get up again! And when your blue, here's what you do. Just sing this happy tune! However if that fails, then you should consider getting professional help.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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