What do you get when you cross a muffin with chocolate chips? A chocolate chip muffin.

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why did jim die? he had cancer why did jim have no hair? it started to fall out when he was 20 and now he is bald at 30 years old

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Why did the man have an extremely large nose? It just so happens that both his father and mother had large noses as well and nature took it's course.

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whats worse that finding your having sex with your long lost sister? having sex with your long lost brother

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What did one fat chick say to the other fat chick? Who cares, they're fat.

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How many licks does it take to get to the center of a Tootsie roll pop? It would have to take a reasonable amount of licks for enough enzymes in the saliva to breakdown the hard candy part.

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You know whats worse than an anti-joke? Practically Anything.

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Roses are red, Violets are red, Trees are red, Bushes are red, Oh shit, my garden is on fire

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What's slow and spotted? A cheetah, I lied about the slow part

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haiku's are funny. but sometimes they don't make sense. refrigerator.

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There are too many people in this bar, a man says. He then walks out of the bar and proceeds to visit his grandmother. Orange.

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What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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What did a blonde and a Puerto Rican name their baby? Joshua, after the blonde's grandfather who passed away a year earlier.

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What's the difference between a trampoline and a dead baby? I take my cleats off when I jump on the trampoline

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What do you get when you combine a cat and a dog? A Cog

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what do you call a dumb blonde with no arms? Her name because she will not respond to anything else

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Why was the kid dizzy? He ran in a circle repeatedly.

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What is blue and has clouds in it? The sky.

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Tic tac toe Your mother and I are getting a divorce.

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Q:what did one lawyer say to the other lawyer? other person: What? A:how am i suppose to know I'm not a lawyer.

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so a man goes to jurrasic park and sees two dinosaurs fighting. he shits himself.

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Stephen Hawking walks into a bar

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, it got hit on the way there.

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Whats white and black and red all over? A panda that has just been shot by a poacher.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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