what do you call a baby with no arms and no legs in a mailbox? a horriffic murder

Why did the man eat a human heart? Because he was part of a dangerous, religious cult.

While running away a burgular cut his hand on a piece of glass. He fell to the ground bleeding like crazy. What did the police say when he saw the burgular? You've been caught red handed.

Q: What's worse than finding a shrimp platter on a babys hand. A: A baby's hand on a shrimp platter

Stop. Seriously stop.

A dyslexic walks into a bar. He called it a bra because he was dyslexic and dyslexics misspell things. People laughed at him because mental disabilities are inherently humorous to them.

What do you call a chicken with no head? A chicken with no head.

High enough to know that fucking IQ is a terrible way to measure the total potential of the mind, which is potentially limitless depending on the person`s contact and control over the subconscious state.

What's the easiest way to become President? Have a background in politics and a catchy campaign slogan that voting Americans can relate to.

Knock knock. Who's there? Imaj. Imaj who? Haha, you're a Jew.

Why not zoidburg? Because Zoidburg is a alien from another planet and the human population is probally afraid to talk to him do to the potential danger of alien contact.

Who is the dumbest person on the entire internet? Shortpoet-GTD

"Knock knock." "Who's there?" "Plumber, ma'am." "Thank God you're here. I haven't been able to take a shower in three days."

roses are red violets are blue your mum is a whore as are you:)

What starts with an N and ends with R, that you wouldn't want to call a black person? Neighbor

There once was a man from Peru, he couldn't fit into his shoe. He went to Brazil bought a big. Swallowed it and died.

What's funnier than a chicken? nothing.

What's the opposite of Christopher Walkins? Christopher Reeves.

Knock knock Who's there? Orange That's impossible...

How does a yeti say hi? Raaawwwrrrr

A blind man walks into a bar. He had a few drinks then went home.

Why did Sally drop her ice cream? She got hit by a bus. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

A man walks into a bar hes later assassinated and mourned by his family.

Two muffins are in an oven. They say nothing, muffins are inanimate objects and therefore cannot talk.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...