Knock, knock -The door's open.

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Where did the two Jews ride when they got married? In the back of the oven.

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This is a story of Bobbie He was fat so he got bullied at school he did not have any friends. He ate a lot and watched the television. He was called names such as big, fat, an idiot, clumsy. But he begun to realise that if he was smart, he could become rich. So he studied hard and hard, but he did not become better at it. So he thought I want to succeed in sports, so he began exercising and was on a strict diet, but nothing changed. He was still fat and unfit. Then one day he knew that he couldn't succeed. So he asked God, what is the purpose of me living, why can't I have something, maybe a talent. God replied I'm sorry but I can't give you a talent. You have to figure it out by yourself. Then Bobbie knew what his talent was. So the following morning Bobbie went to www.anti-joke.com and began writing jokes. Octopus. Bye

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Is worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Getting AIDS.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was dead.

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So i was writing a letter to my girlfriend on valentines day right ? So this is how it goes . " hey lisa happy volentines day!" my black friend walks up to me and says" its a mightyfine day out! " The moral of the story is... Tomatoes can't fly planes

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-Why didn't a girl cry after she fell down with her bike? -Because a handlebar pinned her lung.

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Why did the man tell the child to get into the van? They were late for a field trip.

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Roses are gold Violets are blue I am color blind

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what did the indian boy say to his friend? I wish you were real

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People who find just saying 69 is the funniest thing ever.

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Why don't you hit a black guy riding a bike? Because that is dangerous and he could get hurt.

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Godzilla steps on a bar and orders a Scotch.

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Why did the boy engage in oral sex with the other boy. He was a hormonal homosexual.

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Two Naked men jump off a cliff. Three months later, an entire pack of Cub Scouts were enrolled in group therapy. It's ongoing.

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A teacher, a consturction worker, and an army general are on an airplane. The pilot tells them the plane has too much weight, and if they don't each drop one item then the plane will crash. Realizing one item each is obviously not enough weight to throw off, the teacher and the construction worker team up and throw the army genral off the plane. They land safely, and live the rest of their life haunted by their vile actions.

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roses are red violets are blue i have dementia its not funny

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Dollar ice tea... I drink that Supa hot fire... i spit that Two and a half men................... I watch that

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What do you call a dog without a bone? Floppy.

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What's worse then getting socks on Christmas? Being murdered by a bear.

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a sausage maker buys a box of cereal

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how many pieces of wood can a lumberjack cut in a minute? three dead squrlles a hat and and half of a tree oh and a bus. and if u get in his way alot of guts spewed every where

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A bear goes to target, soon after animal control came and put it in a nearby zoo

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What's the difference between a cat and a dog? They are different species... do i really need to explain the difference??

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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