What do you call a Black guy picking cottnon? A cottonpicker

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What did the pedophile say to the delightfully curly-headed youth? If I can't have you, I'm going to shoot you through the nails with a nail gun.

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What's worse then getting socks on Christmas? Being murdered by a bear.

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Remember when Jesse Ziegenbein was skinny?

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What's funnier than 10 dead babies in a trash can? 1 dead baby in 10 trash cans.

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Which ballet do pigs like best? Pigs don't understand ballet, but they probably like the ones with audience participation, as they are friendly animals and enjoy interacting with humans.

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How many polish people does it take to change a light bulb? Just one. The polish are a civilized and prosperous country.

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What happened to him after he died? He got buried.

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How many pollacks does it take to screw in a lightbuld? Likely the same number as is required when people of non-polish descent screw in lightbulds. Overall however it is variable based on the number or bulbs, position of bulbs in relation to ceiling, potential shakiness of required ladder, and desired efficiency. Please reference GE's lightbuld home instillation handbook for further information or alternately contact your local electrician or handy neighbor.

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What happened to that guy who fell? He died from car accident 3 days later.

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snooki

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a sausage maker buys a box of cereal

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A Finn, a Swede and A Norwegian went to an island. The Norwegian shot them all.

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A dog walks into a bar and orders a pint of beer The barman replies : Woof Woof

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Why did the Little girl fell off the swing? A: Because she had no arms. And why did she fell again? A: Because her parents laugh about it and ride her again.

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Why did the vulture cross the road? To get to the pile of dead babies left over from the Holocaust.

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why did the man have a hole in his face? because syphillis had eaten a hole in it

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a man walks into a bar with a poodle stuffed halfway up his rectum... WHY ARE YOU WAITING FOR A PUNCHLINE!? MY GOD! THIS MAN HAS A DOG UP HIS ANUS!

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Why can't the toucann fly anymore? Because they're extinct

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Yo Mama so stupid she thought "Dunkin Doughnuts" was a basketball team.

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When you try to go to anti-joke.com but get redirected to Horsehead Network...

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Several ways to annoy people: Grab the end of their shirt to blow your nose Try to shove a bowling ball down there throat Try to sell them a broom and vacuum Try to eat their babies paint their toe Nibble their ankles Ask if you can babysit their crystal and if they say no start whining Carry around your chicken and ask if they want a nugget

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didnt, it got stuck at a red light, it waited 5 minutes before getting frustrated and leaving. Later that day the chicken realized that it had forgotten to press the button.

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What did one jew say to the other? Hello.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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