Why can't the Mexican float? He never learned the proper technique as he was not allowed to take swim class.

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What did the little boy with diabetes get for Christmas? A shot of insulin; just like every other day.

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A man walks into a bar, furious that his son had been knocked down by a car and was now in hospital with a fractured leg and concussion. Another man, who sits on a stool at the end of the bar, is playing with his drink and wondering if his wife had made a chicken curry, since she said she would for tonight's dinner.

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Chuck Norris was once approached by a woman for whom he had to fight a man to obtain all while doing a mundane activity in an unorthodox manner. He promptly declined for he is married and told the man he only fights for self-defense. He proceeded to put his pants on one leg at a time like everybody else.

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One night, a heartbroken magician named Jeff went to a bar. Jeff met a nice girl, and they talked and laughed together for hours. After a while, Jeff asked her, "do you want to see a magic trick?" She ate his wiener.

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What do Michael Jackson and most Catholic priests have in common? They're dead.

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What is worst about the great white shark? It's hundreds of sharp teeth, strong tail, or subtle racism? Probably the teeth.

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Yo Momma so fat, that she need the atlantic to take a bath!

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Why did the guy run out of the whorehouse? Because when she spread her legs it looked like she was pulling apart a grilled ham and cheese sandwich.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Im bad with colours Nice tits

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Why did the boy trip over the garden gnome? He didn't trip. He died of a burst artery.

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Did you ever hear about that rich Mexican?? No. Yeah, me neither.

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Roses are brown Violets are brown What the hell who keeps shitting in my garden

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What's black and white and red all over? Michael Jackson after being hit by a train.

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What did the players of the all black NBA team say to the white rookie? "Congratulations for making it to the NBA! Your hard work and dedication has certainly paid off."

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Q How do you know when a gay walks into a bar A Albert rushes over and starts feeling him up

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I like food. But what's more than that it is necessary for survival. ASIAN!!!!

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Me: Hey mom Mom: Hey Son Me: Whats? for dinner? Mom: I dont know

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What's brown and white all over? Chad butthole

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What did the chair say to the guy? Nothing, as it is a chair and chairs can't talk

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My gifts to my gf included: A diamond ring, a sports car, a house in malibu, a new credit card, a private jet, but most importantly, a Refrigerator.

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Turkey Balls

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There are two eggs sitting in a carton in the refrigerator. The first egg says, "Sure is cold in here, eh?" The second egg replies, "Holy crap! A talking egg!"

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y was man afaid of fire?, cuz its hot

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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