Roses are red violets are blue I'm black give me money

A guy comes home from work every day to his wife, who always seems miserable. He decides that her unhappiness is making him unhappy aswell, so he sits her down to talk things over. It turns out she is depressed because she can't get a job and the back wheels of her wheelchair are rusting.

My mother-in-law fell down a wishing well, I was amazed, I never knew they worked

What did the pencil say to the other pencil? Nothing, pencils do not have the ability to speak as they are an object.

What did the alien say to the parachute? We're connected

in·fun·dib·u·lum? 1. a funnel-shaped organ or part. 2. a funnel-shaped extension of the hypothalamus connecting the pituitary gland to the base of the brain. 3. a space in the right ventricle at the base of the pulmonary artery.

Jhon is riding his wheelchair, but can't get up the driveway. Lucky a stranger passes by. Jhon: Can you help me please sir? Stranger: No

Did you ever notice that if you blow in a dogs face it goes mad, yet when you take him on a car ride he sticks his head straight out the window?

What do you call a blue colored dog with seven legs, that oinks? not a dog...

Why did the little boy cry and run home from the store? Because the store was out of pickles.

Why was the boy sad? Because he looked behind him and saw a pedophile penis in his ass.

A blonde lady has a sore throat. Her colleague tells her that whenever she has a sore throat, she performs oral sex on her husband and swallows, and this cures the problem. The next day, the blonde comes into work. The colleague asks if she followed her advice, and the blonde says yes and it worked. The blonde also passes a message from her boyfriend thanking her colleague for the suggestion. The two sets of spouses eventually became close friends and were godparents to each others' children.

A nuclear device is dropped on hiroshima. Does it make a sound? The answer is yes because the americans are laughing in Enola Gay

Whats worse than it raining on your birthday? 911

What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? The first is a person of the Jewish Faith and the other is a popular item of food.

If this becomes top-viewed I will post more milk related jokes

Sammy bought 48 donuts. He ate 36. What was Sammy left with? Diabetes. Sammy was left with diabetes.

What do you call a cow painted in red a cat ( PS : i lied about the cow + the paint ! )

Roses are red Violets are blue Sugar is sweet And I hate Jewish people

A dyslexic pervert asks to see a woman's bar. Then he is chased to the bra next door.

Women's rights

Dog walks into a bar Asked for a hard cider Got it

Why was the mom happy cause her daughter had an abortion

why did the white man walking down the street have no hair? he had had cancer for 5 years prior.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...