Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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What's long, yellow, and can kill you if swallowed? A school bus

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Knock Knock Who's There? Peyton Peyton who? Peyton Manning

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Ask me if I'm a tree. Are you a tree? Yes.

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There's a elf ,a peice of paper, and a pencil. What happens next? The elf writes on the paper.

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How did the Nazis torture someone? They inserted a glass tube in the penis and flicked the end so that it shattered.

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what do you get when you cross a red snugulo and a blue glurga? your on acid

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Why did the bird fall out of the tree? Because it was struck by lightning and died.

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Knock-Knock Come in! ...

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A Mexican walks into a bar. He walked out with a concussion. -ilikecrepes97

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What happens when you run over a mexican? The country gets one less illegal immigrant.

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A retarded man walks into a bar and everyone was polite about his disability.

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how do you get rid of your home work? give it to your dog!

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What's worse than the holocost? 6 Million Jews

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what did the blind orphan with no legs get for christmas? cancer.

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yo Mama so stupid that she took a piece of paper and taped it on the t.v and called it paperview.

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What's black, white, and red all over??? A penguin in a blender.

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Why couldn't the black man swim? He has no legs.

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Why did the airplane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? We will never know. Chickens are incapable of communicating with humans and thus the intent of the chicken can only be speculated.

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What did the apple say to the orange? Nothing because their both fruits.

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Knock, knock Who's there? I'm there.

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What did the cow do when it got run over by a tractor? It died.

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A man is on his way home from a business trip and walks into his house. He is quite as to not wake up his wife or kids. He gets to the bedroom to find his wife in bed with the neighbor. He is shocked at what he came home to and decides to file for divorce. She was a stay at home mom and loses everything because of the divorce. The man woke up from his horrible nightmare and kissed his wife on the cheek. She has always been faithful. He decides to tell her about the dream and, for insurance, emphasizes the part where she loses everything in the divorce. They happily live out the rest of their lives together.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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