SBB

I thought we where okay, you seemed so nice and calm before, are you okay? What happened?

What do you get when you take a bag of chips and divide it by 5? a Nike store worker's meal

Two peanuts were walking down the street, one was assaulted, the other was brutally raped.

What did the zombie say to the woman? I like turtles.

Whats the difference between a hoover and a harley? one is a vacuum, and the other is a motorcycle.

What did the jew do to his waiter? He explained how he had provided excellent service and left a very generous tip to applaud his efforts.

A: What do you call a deer with no eyes? A: I got NoEyeDeer!!!

A dinosaur is walking down the street. He is soon confronted by a human. The human says to the dinosaur, "Hey, your a dinosaur." Which the dinosaur replies with, "Yes, yes i am." The dinosaur then stands there for a few seconds wondering why he is in the same time period as the human. And as to why a dinosaur would talk.

Two men walked into a bar. I'm surprised the second man did not duck out of the way.

why did the woman call the police? because there was a murderer pointing a gun at her at her son.

300 terrorists have a contest, they all jump off a tower and die. Who wins? Society.

There was a man who entered a local paper's pun contest. He sent in ten different puns, in the hope that at least one of the puns would win. On of them was moderately amusing and took home the modest prize.

Q:Why did the Mexican cross the border? A:To come to America to provide for his starving family.

Camon is to Jerry Sandusky as Cole Ryder is to Will Higgins!

A woman walks into a bar and asks for a duck. The bartender is confused, assumes the women has some sort of mental problem, and treats her nicely, as his sister suffers from Down's Syndrome.

Wanna hear the most repeated joke on anti jokes? Why did [insert name here] fall off the swing? Because he/she had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not [insert name here].

Whats black and white and read all over? A dead magpie.

Why would a woman be out of the kitchen? Because she is busy working, being outside, resting, or any other activity that does not include food.

What do you call a man who has a camera? a cameraman

Chris Bosh's neck

My neighbor's kid was running around yelling magical spells. I said "Wow, you really want to be like Harry Potter, don't you?". He said "Yes!". So, I killed his parents and locked him under the stairs.

What's the difference between your jokes and your penis? No one laughs at your jokes.

why did the duck cross the road? because his d**k was stuck in the chickens a**....

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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