Did you hear the one about the HIV positive man that got rear-ended on the highway? The motorist behind him was distracted on his cell phone, and did not hit the breaks in time to stop.

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A priest and a rabii walk into a bar. Both men, despite both being good people and well respected in their communities, aren't able to overcome their differences which are signified by their religions. Both men later leave the bar and surround themselves with people of their own kin.

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A women walks into a kitchen.

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Why is there no Asprin in the rainforest? Because it's financially viable to sell pharmesuticals in the vast, unpopulated rainforest.

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1. Look at the size of his putter. 2. Oh, dang, my shaft's all bent. 3. You really wacked the hell out of that sucker. 4. After 18 holes I can barely walk. 5. My hands are so sweaty I can't get a good grip. 6. Lift your head and spread your legs. 7. You have a nice stroke, but your follow through leaves a lot to be desired. 8. Just turn your back and drop it. 9. Hold up. I've got to wash my balls. 10. Damn, I missed the hole again.

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What do you call a Chineses filled with bus?

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what did the duck say to the monkey.............. QUACK!!!!!!!!

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Dear 6, Please stop spreading rumors about me. I heard you do some pretty nasty things with 9. Sincerely, 7

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What does a eagle and a bunny have in common.. nothing they're two different animals.

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What's five times 10? Sixty, you retarded fuck.

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Why didn't the boy cross the street? He didn't have legs

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How do you make a plummer sad? Kill his family.

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What's worse then getting kicked in the face by Chuck Norris? A: Nothing

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Sometimes I sit in the bath and pretend im a bubble

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what electronic vegetable sits in a chair? stephen hawking

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you know its foggy outside when you step outside and its foggy outside.

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Q:why did the boy not have to walk his dog? A: because the dog and the rest of his family died in a terrible house fire while he was away at summer camp.

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whats worse than getting no gifts for christmas? getting hit by a bus for christmas

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Why was Junior sad? His parents were killed in a car crash.

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A racist man walks into an all black church. He has no problem with the people there as he is a black man who hates caucasion people.

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Lucas talks to mom she says hi

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What's green and fuzzy and will kill you if it falls out of tree? A Pool Table

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Yup, I mean we use all of your techniques and all things considered the messages end up looking pretty much the same, as if the same person had written them, Azure is named Carlos, and well, he is pretty much a computer wiz so you have nothing to worry about.

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Do you have emotional issues, ever have a really bad day and just wanna talk call this number (402-314-5287) < N1GGER

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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