hey i just met you and this is c r a z y , but im a pirate so call me matey ;)

What's green and would kill you if it fell on you? A golf course

what did the soccer player say when he missed a penalty? damnit.

Knock Knock. Who's there? Batman. Batman who? Batman is stunned by the fact that there is in fact someone that does not know him.

Why did the man slowly cross the road? He had a prosthetic leg.

River Ravi flows in which state? Liquid state.

In soviet russia...the abundance of natural oils and rich agricultural land provide it with a thriving economy

A horse walks into a bar, the bartenders asks "Why the long face?"

knock knock whos there rock rock who rocks dont knock stupid

Why did the young boy lose a testicle? Because he was viciously raped by a large parrot

A woman is in a terrible car crash. The husband comes in, runs to the doctor and he says "Doctor! My wife...is she going to make it?" The doctor turns and says "your wife will survive, but she's experienced heavy brain trauma. She will never walk again. You'll have to bathe her, feed her, change her diapers, and cater to her every need." The husband starts crying and says "oh my God that's terrible! Are you serious?" The doctor replies "Yes."

I always like to pack a second pair of pants, because if there's one thing my mother ever said to me it was 'please, I'm begging you - don't put me in a home.'

2 gay men walked into a bar, The next day they want back to the bar, They went back on the third day but only 1 man came back out and he was in tears, This was because the other man had a cardiac arrest and died.

Whats blue, green and red, and runs trough the strees each sunday? ...What? I have no idea, I was hoping you did.

Ginger woodpecker throbbing in the moonlight

What was that pirate movie rated? PG-13

A man walk to the store and buys some clothes.

roses are red violets are blue if i had a gun i would shoot you

Why did the guy jump out of the plane? he was parachuting

what is the difference between batman and a black guy. bat man is white

What did the pineapple say to the apple? Nothing, neither can speak.

What's worse than a baby in a dumpster? A baby in two dumpsters

I like my women like I like my coffee. Hot, black, liquid, and in a cup.

Whats worse than a dog biting you? Cancer.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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