you know somebody is lying when it IS opposite day.

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Your mom is so fat that she has type 2 diabetes.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I haven't been able to deal Since the day that I lost you. Now these roses bleed red And these violets cry blue I think of you in memories Do you think of me too?

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What do you call a man running around town with no clothes on? Naked.

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Why can't black people swim? Because there are sharks in the lake.

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Whats worse than the Holacaust? Stepping on damn Lego's. MrBounty44

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Why did th chicken cross the road? To get to your house. Knock knock! Who's there? The chicken

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Knock Knock Who's there? Cindy Cindy who? Cindy your neighbor. I was wondering if I could borrow some milk, I ran out.

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Why didn't the girl take her hairbrush to school? She has cancer and all her hair fell out.

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Why did the pumpkin stop using the jack hammer? Pumpkins cannot use power tools since they are nothing but orange gourds. But, [for sport] say this ‘pumpkin’ was incarnate; one could assume he was done with his demolition work. He then would return the portable drill to the rental facility and get his deposit back.

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I was walking down the street and a guy fell down right next to me. He woke up a hour later and asked "what smells like year old cat pee?" I said "year old cat pee retard honestly." Then he died. Morale don't ask questions you don't want to know the answers to.

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Wishing to teach his donkey not to eat, a pedant did not offer him any food. When the donkey died of hunger, he said: ‘I’ve had a great loss. Just when he had learned not to eat, he died.

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why did the disabled man go to the shops? because he wanted a radiator panel

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KNOCK KNOCK who's there? OUCH! what's your door knob made of? nails?

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Sugar is sweet, Death is inevitable.

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Did you hear the one about the chicken crossing the road? It wanted to go to the other side.

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Whats green, lies in a ditch, and is covered in cookie crumbs? A girl scout that got hit by a car

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Holocaust jokes suck. Anne frankley, I won't stand for them

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Difference between African children and a fat boy? nothing, they're always hungry.

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Racial equality.

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Why was the boy seeing stars? It was night time.

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- Why Mexicans have small steering wheels in their cars? - Because of this they are able to drive a car in handcuffs.

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What happened when Stephen Hawking tried to go down the stairs? He fell and suffered minor injuries.

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Is your refridgerator running? good, because if it wasn't then your food would spoil.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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