What is Santa's favorite color? Blue

Did you hear the joke about Hellen Keller? Neither did she.

What's funny about anti-jokes? Nothing.

Whats the difference between a house and a truck? Ones a truck the other one is a house

Justin Becnel falls off a tree, what happens? He breaks his neck and unfortunately dies.

What's flying and eats rocks? A flying rock eater

What did the ghost say to the black man? nothing. He just shot him.

What did the african child get for christmas? Abducted.

Why should people with Alzheimer's not tell jokes? To get to the other side.

What's fun and challenging? Writing an anti-joke.

Roses are red, Violets are blue. I have a gun! So I KILL YOU!!!!

Q:How do you fit ten babies into a bucket? A: A blender Q:How do you get them out? A: Nachos

What did the squirrel say to Justin Bieber? We both enjoy nuts.

A man with Tourette's syndrome walks into a bar. Because of his disease, he shouts unexpected profanities across the room, and everybody in the bar bursts into laughter. The man cannot handle the humiliation anymore and goes home. He opens a drawer in his bedroom, pulls out a gun, and points it at his head. His wife walks in on him about to commit suicide. She is horrified. He then looks at her and then down, and he notices his one and only daughter by the age of 7 is by her side. The man ponders his reckless decision he was about to make. Moments later he and his family are holding one another sobbing in each others arms. A few days later the man goes back to the bar and shoots everybody there. Shocked and afraid, he curled up into a ball and regretted his decision. An hour later the police arrived and he was sentenced to life in prison for 3rd degree murder. His wife moved on and started a new family with his former best friend, and his daughter vists him every first tuesday of every other month. The man still suffers from Tourette's and cannot control his ticks and rots in jail. He continues to scream random obscenities for the rest of his life with no parole.

Why did Tupac Shakur get shot? He was a famous and very controversial celebrity, which naturally led to having a lot of enemies.

Why is Helen Keller a bad driver? Because her inability to see or hear makes her an extremely dangerous road hazard.

A black man walks into a bar. He sits down and has a couple drinks. When he is finished, he generously tips the bartender and walks out.

Why was the white girl crying? Because she was sad.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding a worm in an apple within a worm inside your apple...

So, a man walks into a bar, and he ends up in intensive care, because the bar was very hot and gave him severe burns. He was on business in an industrial park.

Why did the priest blow a kiss and waved to the little girl? She was his daughter. Why did the daughter's mother call the cops on the priest? Child support

Why can't black guys eat babby back ribs... Beacause They are black too

FIONN'S LIFE

knock knock who's there? Bill Bill who? Bill Smith, we went to high school together. Oh hey Bill, come on in.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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