Whats green and fuzzy and if it fell out of a tree it would kill you? A pool table.

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What is white, black, and red all over? A: A zebra being slaughtered.

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Yeah, I mean to be honest with you, I get that one a lot.

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Why did the Jew have so much money? He had a good education and therefore, a high paying job.

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Today i saw 2 midgets walking.........now there hanging together.....in a tree.....by there necks,,,,...............I f***n hate midgets

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michael: How old do I look? stranger: about 68? How old are you? michael: I cant remember I have alzheimers. michael: How old do I look?

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A boy walks into his friend's house for a party. While he waits for his friends to return from the bar he realizes there are many people waiting in different lines for various kinds of drinks. After his friends return he decides he does not want any of the carbonated drinks they had ordered, instead he chooses to wait in the fruit punch line. There is no punch line.

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They didn't stop pulling my hair i didn't stop pulling the trigger

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A man walked into a bar. He was meeting his friends but was 30 minutes early so he went down the road to buy some food. He had recently began dieting after watching a series of lifestyle programs which informed him of the potential risks involved with high cholesterol and blood pressure levels. He purchased a garden salad and a freshly squeezed orange juice, and made it back to the bar in time to meet his friends.

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What did the 14 year old girl get on her birthday? A cake that read, "You're adopted"!

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What did Anne Frank say to the Nazis who found her? Please be gentle.

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I may have Alzheimer's. But at least I don't have Alzheimer's.

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Why do they bury lawyers 10 feet deep? Because deep down they are really good people.

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say cheese

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Why did the man throw the baby at the brick wall? I don't know, but that is a tragic incident and I will now go mourn.

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I AM SHOWERING IN THE BLOOD AND ORGANS OF ENDORPHIN RUSH IN ORDER TO APPEASE THE GODS KNOWN AS... ME, MYSELF, AND I!

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womens rights

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What's worse than a necrophobiac in a morgue? A necrophiliac. What's worse than a necrophiliac in a morgue? Seeing your family hacked to death by an evil axe murderer.

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the game

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what do you call a tall skiny kid with a very big ego autistic.........colby schluter.

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A woman fell victim to nasty car accident. Her injuries were very grave. The doctors warned her family that she had two hours to live. She died two hours later.

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tennis grunts . . . no different from sex noises

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A horse walks into a bar. He politely holds the door for a young woman.

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Why did the football coach go to the bank? To make a deposit

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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