Little Miss Muffett sat on her tuffet eating her curds and whey along came her food allergies and she died

What did the American WWII soldier say to the Feudal-era samurai? Nothing, because the two lived on completely different continents and in completely different time periods.

I hated the Reading festival, i'm dyslexic. I hated it because my family died in a housefire while I was there.

Why didn't little Jimmy eat his dinner? Jimmy didn't eat his dinner because there was no food. Jimmy is a poor street urchin who died of starvation.

What did Batman say to Robin before getting in the car? Get in the car.

What did the boy say to his father? I don't know. With the seemingly infinite number of topics that two people could discuss and the fact that both the father and son are fictional, it would be unreasonable and border edge mentally unstable for me to assume that you would know what they may or may not be talking about.

Why can't Stevie Wonder read? Because he's blind.

Why did the mentally disabled child begin to cry? Because he shit himself

Last night, I went fishing, caught a fish, brought it home, grilled it, ate it, and went to bed.

girls basketball

Why didn't Debbie go to the theme park with the rest of her family? Because she died the week before.

You are pretty bad emulations, first of all you should all swear and cuss a lot, that way you never get green thumbs and you all get minimal attention (negative attention) from people whose messages do not concern. I mean come on, if you are all different, you gotta admit that you are all good at typing like the very same person, its just that, none of them are good at sounding as the guy they are trying to emulate.

I like my women like I like my coffee Without a penis

why did the homosexual man cross the road? to get to his gay partner.

How can you tell the difference between a black man and a white man? Quite easily actually.

Jack and Jill went up the hill to smoke some marijuana, Jack got high, pulled down his fly, and asked Jill if she wanna. Jill said yes, pulled up her dress, and had a little fun. But stupid Jill forgot the pill, and now they have a son

yo mamas so dumb she named her house butt and her son crack and then she called the police saying I looked all over my butt and i can not find my crack.

What do you call the worst band ever? Nickelback.

How do you kill a red elephant? You can't red elephants don't exist.

What would you do for a klondike bar? I'm allergic to milk.

What's worse than losing your job? Getting repeatedly hit in the face with a brick after getting fired from your job.

Q: What is a laptop that sings? A: A Dell

The movie starts off with Tom Cruz jumping out of a plane. He hits the ground and dies, end of movie. - Cole G.

How do you make a plumber cry? You kill his family.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...