A man walks outside and walks back in. Why? Because it was raining purple unicorns and he felt the need to go back inside.

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It works on whoever I have an emotional attachment with, for example people might be thinking you and I write in the exact same style, but I am actually copying your way of typing (spelling, word composition etc) this because we relate on a deep emotional level with people that like "get us" because they can act and behave like us. This again doubles the effect of the hypnosis, since when I get "super high on trance" and you feel that way, well, we both reach into the same wavelength, literally. Scientists and hypnotists supposedly have no idea as to why this happens, but I know, it is because our brain patterns are so similar, that even though we are at a long distance, your body believes itself to be an extension of mine and the other way around. How do I know this? Yogurt.

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Roses are red but violets arent blue!!!!!

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why did the chicken cross the road? no one knows because it got hit by a bus.

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what's worse than fining out that the best and worst jokes on anti-joke.com are about the Holocaust The Holocaust

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To warn people on the other side that the sky was falling Why did the cow cross the road? Cause he had madcow disease Why did Chuck Norris cross the road? Cause he's Chuck Norris Why did the Mexican cross the road? He was on his way to America Why did the black man cross the road? He was just running to his car you racist.....after he had robbed the bank Why did the horse go to the other side of the field? He liked green grass

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why was the child crying? because his friend just got hit by a van.

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Why do people laugh at the number 69? Honestly I don't know, its just a number isn't it?

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What's brown and sticky? A stick.

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way do Japan bomb pearl harbor because America hat sex with China [watch Hetalia]

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How can you make sure your friend wont die of cancer? Decapitate him

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How hard is it to cross a man with a tree? Jesus only needed a few nails

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Mom I am so sorry I molested you yesterday. Im not your mom! Phew, wanna go out?

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What crawls on the ground and shoots arrows? Legless Legolas.

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What's the worst part about being a black Jew? You have to sit at the back of the oven.

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''thanks for giving me back the money i lent you david''-said nobody

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What is better than AIDS? Cancer.Cancer and more cancer

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What did the one midget say to the other midget? We r both small

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you walk into a bar Griffin: 'are you ok'

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what did the guy say before he went to kill the other guy? Im killing you

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Why did a jew die? It got killed by a nazi.

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Janey Had her first kiss with Jonny. Jonny choked on her ridiculously large was of gum and died.

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I will create more jobs for americans

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Charmander is red,Squitle is blue,If you were a pokemon i'd choose you.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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