What did the bodybuilder do when someone stole his wallet? Ab workouts.

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What did Joan of Arc have for her last meal? Steak

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the car? "Robin get in the car"

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Aladdin found a rusty old lamp at the foot of a mountain. He rubbed it and the Ginnie had died after the long drop from the cliff

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What do you do if a Polish soldier throws a hand-grenade at you? Run.

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What did the Canadian Goose say to the Snow Goose? You're white.

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Your mama's so fat.... I ran around her twice, And got lost

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If an anti joke is told, and it is about an aunty is it an aunty anti joke? Adolf Hitler.

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Knock knock Who's there Police

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what do you call a kid without arms and legs? Freak

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Why did Justin Beiber fall out of a plane? Because i pushed him off

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When is the best time to eat? When you feel like it.

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Wanna know how to confuse a black guy? Give him a friend chicken sandwich with mayo on it.

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How do you get 100 Jews into a car? ...Nevermind, it wouldn't work.

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So a jelly bean walks into a bar. The bartender asks him "whatchuu doin here jelly bean" the jelly bean doesn't respond and sits there awkwardly because he neither speaks English nor has the brain capacity to move or breathe. The bartender closes the store and comes back the next day to find the bean in the same awkward position.

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Your momma is so white, when she goes out in the sun it is necessary for her to use a lotion with an SPF greater than 30 because she burns easily and is also afraid of skin cancer.

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a bald man walks into a hairdressers and demands beans on toast.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Boo To whom is Boo?

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An apple a day keeps a check next to the "I ate an apple today" box on my "what I did today" daily checklist.

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What do you call a blue penquin dipped in chocolate doing the samba? A blue penquin dipped in chocolate doing the samba!

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What do you call it when you lend money to a bison? Unitelligent, because bison do not have the ability to purchase things with money so it will most likely just eat the money.

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What did the chicken say when it crossed the road? Nothing. Chickens can't talk.

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What did the duck get for Christmas. A potato. Not really it got nothing because it's a duck

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Q: What do you do when your friend tells you he murdered someone? A: Call the police.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops