Q: What do you call a kid with no arms and an eye patch? A: His name.

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What do you get when you mix a panda,oklahoma,and a handle? The oklahoma panhandle.

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What's worse than the unwarrented death of six milliion Jews? The death of six million and one Jews

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Whats Big, black, and in your moms underwesar? A snake that escaped from a pet store which is causing a lot of commotion in the local community. Meanwhile your mom is getting drilled by a big psycho who escaped the mental institution. JMM

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Q: How do you solve a problem like Maria. A: You kill her. You kill Maria.

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Why can't the boy ride his bike to school? It has no wheels.

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What's the difference between a table lamb? A fishing pole, automobiles are very useful

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What's worse than tieing a baby to a moving fan? Stopping it with a shovel

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why did the nazi eat the jew? He didn't

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Three men walk into a bar. Start drinking, fight each other and sustain massive head injuries.

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What do you call a black man at harvard? Probably a criminal who is in harvard law trying to find a good lawyer.

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The last time I heard that joke, I fell off my pet single celled bacteria.

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Why do people like the number 69? Because some people have favorite numbers, and 69 is a number.

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(read this aloud): A man walks into a bar with a giraffe. Him and the giraffe order multiple shots and get hammered. The giraffe on the other hand can't hold his liquor so well, and ends up passing out on the floor of the bar. The man decides to leave him there and take off. On his way out, the bartender yells, "Hey, you can't just leave that lyin' there!" and the man says, "It's not a lion, it's a giraffe!"

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Roses are red, That much is true, but Violet are purple, not ****ing blue

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What happened to Liam? He Died.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? I don't know.

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Two Mexicans walk into a bar, The bartender says your hired.

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what hurts more than a stab wound? two stab wounds

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Q: What's black and white, and red all over ? A: A penguin in a blender.

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An asian, black man and a white guy are stranded in a desert with no food and no water, so what do they do Die

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whats brown and sticky? a four week dead uunborn african child...

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A Mormon bishop, a Jewish Rabbi, and a Moslem Imam all died on the same day. They went to hell because they thought their good works would save them.

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How do you turn a frown upside down? You cannot do such a thing because frowning is the act of sadness. Therefore you cannot nor should not change a persons attitude.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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