2 tomatoes walk across a road tomato 1 gets hit by a car tomato 2 gets confused, because tomatoes don't have legs and therefore cannot "walk across a road" And furthermore, a tomato does not have a brain, and thus cannot get confused.

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One day, 2 people were gonna fight after school and then the final bell rung. Everyone gathered in the bathroom to watch the fight. The challenger asks the opponent, "Hey whats that one thing you say when you let the other person win?" then the opponent says, "I give up?" The opponent yells, "I win!"

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Why Can't Hellen Keller drive? Because she's a woman.

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" Hey you have something on your face. " ( man speaking punches the guy he was talking to ) " It was pain."

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What did the black guy do to the hooker, he took her dead body out of his trunk

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Q. What did the dog say to the cat? A. Ruff.

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why did the husband always work late nights? he needed the extra hours to provide for his family

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What did the boy with no arms or legs get for christmas? Shoes

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whats worse than being ugly? being aivy.

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"I can't wait to eat this bagle!" "Yes you can." "Yeah, I guess you're right."

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what do you do to gay guy who wants to have anal sex with you? beat him with a steel baseball bat in his face.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Nobody actually knows this because the chicken could not tell us why he/she crossed the road so it would be nearly impossible to get the answer.

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why did the bird fall out of the tree? Earth's Gravitational pull

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Q) 1+1=? A) 6.

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What do you do when life gives you lemons? Make some fucking lemonade.

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Why do gay people go to the beach on memorial? idk im not gay

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I enjoy anal.

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Q: What do you call cheese that isn't yours? A: I have no Idea what you would call cheese which isn't yours. However, it seems quite trivial to take time to discuss a nonsensical topic such as cheese which isn't yours.

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http://attachments.conceptart.org/forums/attachment.php?attachmentid=351301&stc=1&d=1208673890

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What does it mean when the drummer drools out of both sides of their mouth? That they may have had a stroke and you should immediately call 911.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Knock Knock I said, who's there? KNOCK KNOCK OH MY GOD, WHO IS IT??? Yes, we have your daughter here, she was caught doing drugs on school property.

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Four rats are smoking in an alley. One rat turns to another and comments, "These are some fine smokes. Where'd ya score these?" The rat holding the pack of Menthols replies, "Off a' Fred." He points to a rotting whale carcass in the road. The other rats are horrified. "How did a whale die in the street?!," they squeak. "He didn't. He died on the beach."

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what did the left nut say to the right nut? The guy above us is a real dick huh?

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Knock Knock Whose there? Boo I don't know anyone by the name of Boo. Go away

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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