Graphed: hey kids it's time to grape ya in the mouth Girl: noooooooooooooooooooooooooooo Random guy who sponsors the comercial: why is she screaming isn't thus about our new grape drink? Grapist: well… yes but look at the wY she's dresses she totally wants it.

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There are two types of people in this world: those who can count and those who can't. I happen to be one of those who can.

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If you give a homeless man a fish he eats for the night, if you teach him to fish then he probably won't be able to feed himself anyway, he is too poor to afford a pole.

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text this number 2066191208 saying i wanna rape you

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I'm a raging homosexual.

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Why do Iraqi women never sleep with American soldiers? Because Americans always talk about pulling out but they never do!

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Your mama's so fat that she killed herself because she was so depressed about her weight.

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What happened when the chicken crossed the road? The Farmer immediately noticed the oncoming car and flagged it down so the driver would stop and he could grab his chicken and carry it safely back to the coop

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what did the mexicans name their daughter? nothing. they were deported before they had a chance

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Why are Ethiopians so fast? Because antelope are also very fast.

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How do you get 100 illegal immigrants into a furnace? Tell 'em it's England.

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How do you make a mime talk? Put a gun to his head.

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A dermatologist walks into a strip club. He tells the stripper she has hives on her back and that she needs to go to a clinic, then gets up from his lap dance and reports her to management.

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I'm not late, I'm fashionably tardy!!!!

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Why does Michael j. Fox make the best milkshakes? He uses the finest ingredients

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"Who stole the cookies from the cookie jar?" said the little girl. "I don't know", said the mother," we were robbed of all our money and posessions. And your father was killed while we were gone.

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Get out of the way everybody, a group of elephants are tumbling down the mountain!

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Unnnnnnnn

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How did the mecanic die? He drowned

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Your mammas so fat, she weighs significantly more than the average person.

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What's the deal with airline food?

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What gets wetter as it dries? Sarah Jessica Parker

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42

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Why was Susan tied up on the railroad tracks? Because she was a blonde and her dad told her it was a roller coaster.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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