What do you call 100 lawyers at the bottom of the ocean? A good start

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How many dead babies can you fit in a sink? I don't know i forgot to turn the garbage disposal off

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What do you call a white man in the middle of Mexico City? Dave.

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why were Tamika and Tyron afraid to get into the water? They weren't

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Whats better than an anti joke? Having sex with a supermodle

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Yo' mama's such a hoe she got arrested last week for prostitution charges!

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A: Knock Knock B: ...

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Narrator: A ghost walks into a church. It is a Jewish church during a Friday night service. Huh. That ghost looks a lost like Hitler. Oh crap, everyone run for your lives! Stranger: GHOSTBUSTERS! Narrator: what, the, heck? Ghostbuster: let's kill some ghosts! Wait a minute. Adolf, is that you? Hitler ghost: John? Ghostbuster: Adolf, Buddy! Narrator:...... Hitler ghost: Hey, John! Wanna grab a drink? Ghostbuster: sure. let's get out of here. Narrator: This joke has officially lost all meaning. I don't even know why I'm submitting it any more! And get this! I AM HALF JEWISH!

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A mushroom walked into a bar. The bartender says, "We don't serve your kind here." The mushroom said, "What? I'm a fungi." The bartender said, "Exactly. It's a health hazard. I already have two strikes and if I lose the bar my wife will divorce me."

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Why did the child get an 100% on a test?? Because they got all the questions correct.

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What did the Catholic Priest say to the little boy? May God be with you.

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Why couldn't Hellen Keller drive? Because she was a woman

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What's worse than the Holocaust? Finding a worm in your apple?

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What's more annoying than a mosquito? the Sandy Hook Massacre

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Why did Suzie fall off her swing? She was dead

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Why did the man laugh when he saw someone using a shake weight? He remembered Dane Cook's stand up preformance from the night before.

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What do you call a hobo that lives a in a box. A hobo

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What did the hat say to the other hat? Nothing, because hats don't talk, stupid.

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Why couldn't Timmy ride his tricycle? He was run over by a bus.

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What do you call someone who kills black people? A hero.

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What happened when Aladdin rubbed his lamp? It got slightly cleaner.

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What's Worse Than Unripened Fruit? Crippling Depression.

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What's black and white and red all over it? Not a newspaper because red is not all over it. Answers to this question may vary.

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How do Chinese people get their names? From their parents.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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