What doesn't kill you makes you stronger. Unless you're paralyzed.

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what happened to the boy who crossed the street. he got shot by a bus

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How do you make friends with a squrriel? Trust me, don't.

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A man walks into a bar. He is an alcoholic, so to make his activities in the bar into a joke would be disrespectful and inconsiderate.

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What do you call a penis without hair? Apple sause

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Why is 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 has two penises

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I haven't made a school shooting joke yet, but the day is young Just like those kids that got shot

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roses are violets red is blue i like doughnuts doughnuts are good

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Why did Helen Keller's cat kill itself? It didn't, I did.

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Yes.

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A man walks into a bar. He buys a drink, drinks his drink, and leaves.

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How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? Why does it matter, they can't chuck wood in the first place.

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Because you killed my Llama. He was my best-friend.

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So a seal walks into a club..

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Q:Why do people not live forever? A: Because they die dumbass.

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wanna hear a joke? no.

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What is it called when a Native American Indian man smacks a woman in the face for cheating on him? In police code it's called a "273D Domestic violence - Felony" most likely involving an insecure man with control problems simply adding to the stereotype that Native American's are drunk, abusive and domestically violent people.

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There was this guy who walked in the bar with one shoe. The bartender asks what happened. The man said the shoe didn't fit. So the bartender ask where is the other shoe. The man said he threw it away. The bartender looks in the trashcan and sure enough he sees his other shoe. The bartender says "This is the same size as your other shoe. Why are you wearing one shoe?" The man says "I'm just playing a prank on you. There's a hidden camera over there and over there. Is it okay if I can put you on YouTube?" and the bartender says "No."

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How do you kill a circus? Go for the Juggler!

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Roses are red Violates are blue Go to hell I hate you

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Yo' momma's so fat, she has an increased risk of cardiovascula disease and may die.

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I like my women like I like my coffee Without a penis

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I spilled Spot Remover on my dog. Now he is blind and has chemical burns all over his body.

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why do birds fly away when you go near them? incase your black

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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