What did one cannibal set to the other cannibal? Nothing, because he was eating him.

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A man walked into a Persian dentist office. After a few hours he leaves the office with his mouth feeling much better because the oral-surgery went exeptionally well.

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Knock Knock Who's There? It's Me. Oh, OK. Come On In.

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Yo momma so lazy she hasn't been to work in weeks and you no longer have electricity or food.

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No, I do not have the will, I have a family now, I make a living writing fiction, and well, play a small role in keeping not national, but worldwide stability in such things as the economics. The thing is, that you are renegades, you do not break the law, but you like to do things your own way, that gets you enemies among the so called "paragons" in the face of society and media. Its just like back in the days, if CIA, The Feds, Interpol and such are known as the "Paragons of civilization" or "the good guys" if you prefer, they can point towards you guys, and say "these are evil", and then nothing can stop them.

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What do you call a guy who has no experience flying a plane? Suicidal

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What's the difference between a dead cat and a dead woman? It is much more unlikely that you would have sex with a dead cat.

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If a tree falls in the woods and no one is around to hear it does it make a sound? I don't know... Does the deaf woman locked in my basement?

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Q: why did the guys neck hurt after the car crash A: he had a sun burn

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Roses are red, Violet are violet, not blue, dumbass.

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If pro is the opposite of con, then what is the opposite of progress? Digress

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So a Moose walks into this store, and walks up to the lady bitch, and he goes "Hey, lady bitch, where the potatoes?" So the lady bitch goes "Heheh, their in aisle 5." So the moose goes down aisle 5, and there aint no potatoes.

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How do you kill a dinosaur with a spoon? You cant because they are extinct creatures

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What did the fat gypsy say to the attractive young woman aged twenty-five? I know you are probably not remotely interested in having sex with me, but I'm afraid that you have no choice due to the fact that I've locked all of the doors.

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have you tasted chocolate flavoured slurpee? no. i haven't either

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How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? As much as he wants to.

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Why was the women out of the kitchen? She felt the desire to relax after a day of work...

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What's worse than stubbing your toe? Watching your house burn down and your family scream in pain as their flesh burns and you suffer from chronic depression.

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Did you hear about the plane that crashed and killed 1000 people? My sister has cancer.

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why was little bobby sad? he accidentally super-glued Jupiter to his forehead.

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why did the cow eat the seahorse/ because my shift keys are broken1

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Why didn't the restaurant serve the black man? He hadn't ordered anything.

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Why did the Jew die? Because Hitler was born...

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Found out my dad was gay the other day. Now I have to take him to dance clubs, take him to musicals and find the man who gave birth to me.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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