Why did the pumpkin stop using the jack hammer? Pumpkins cannot use power tools since they are nothing but an orange gourd. But, [for sport] say this ‘pumpkin’ was incarnate; one could assume he was done with his demolition work. He then would return the portable drill to the rental facility and get his deposit back.

How do you make someone think your wierd? Pretend to be a panda.

A white man and woman are married and the wife becomes pregnant. However, the wife has been having an affair with an African American man. The baby turns out to be white and so the woman was very fortunate or else the husband would have figured it out for sure.

Im going to france... Why To get french fries! Have fun Im back with a $10000bill to pay Wheres the fries Shit

What did the statue say to the other statue? Nothing, statues cant speak.

Two men walk into a bar. They get drunk.

Now Showing: EVIL SLOTHS II "The worst death is a slow death."

What was the Latino man doing on my laptop? He was my friend and he had asked me first. He was also ordering a computer on amazon for himself.

Knock Knock. Whose there? ..............

Holy fuckfarts! I did mention I am at my mothers place right? What am I saying? What am I typing? Marry me now!

Joey mayer's face

My name is Harry.

Jesus said unto John, "Come forth and receive eternal life." But, John came fifth and won a toaster.

Why did the man's legs start shaking when he saw the attractive women? There was an earthquake

What did the 5 cent store clerk say to the customer? That will be 5 cents.

Q: What comes first the chicken or the egg? A: Pineapple.

Why are you late? Sorry, I would have been here sooner, only I wasn't.

what do you get when you cross an African with a Rhinoceros? A rhinoceros.

What is scary? Obama might get reelected.

What did the house do when it came alive? It went home

What is the difference between a pizza and a Black guy? A pizza can serve a family of four.

What does it mean when the drummer drools out of both sides of their mouth? That they've may have had a stroke and you should immediately call 911.

If you looked up stupid in Webster's dictionary, you wouldn't see a picture of yourself, because Webster's dictionary doesn't have pictures.

What do call a limbless man swimming? Dead.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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