- Anti Joke

Two drums and a cymbol fall off a cliff... ba bum BUM HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA it used to be ba dum ching but im so funny that i changed it to ba dum bum. credit to Alex H

What's the difference between a dead cat and a dead woman? It is much more unlikely that you would have sex with a dead cat.

Why was six afraid of seven? Seven was a registered sex offender.

What did the dying boy get for Christmas? Presents

Why was the little girl crying? Her father has been abusing her and her mother for a year now.

Bob and his family were looking forward to going to an all inclusive holiday to Spain. When they got on the plane, a bomb went off, causing Bob to realise that he was never going to see his family again, and that they were about to suffer a horrific, painful death.

Why did the lightbulb go out? It was on too long

What's the difference between a girlfriend and a wife? You aren't married to a girlfriend.

I'm innocent its all Taggart he's the one instigating.

How do you kill 23 kids? You put 24 kids in an arena.

What time is it when grandpa sits ontop of a telephone pole and throws pineapples at people? Time to go to a nursing home

A: Who are you? B: A random guy who walked into your house A: Oh sorry, I keep forgetting your name.

How do you know if your teacher is gay? Ask him if he is gay.

Why wasn't there an elevator in the rainforest? The rainforest is not capable of managing an elevator because an elevator does in fact require an energy source which is also not capable in a rainforest. The rainforest is filled with animals and is not filled with humans which would make having an elevator in the rainforest useless because the main use of an elevator is to transport humans. The animals in the rainforest would not be able to operate the elevator because using an elevator for them would be advance while humans using elevators is second nature.

Two muffins are in an oven. The first muffin says, "Boy it's hot in here." The second says, "It sure is." Both muffins then faint from heat exhaustion and are eaten to death when taken out of the oven And thus tragically, the world would never know of the spectacular talking muffins.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops

(speaking to an orphan) knock, knock who's there not your parents

A baptist priest walks into a bar with a boner.

who hooks up with grade 7's? •Jake Muchnik

So, why is winter so terrible? Because, Napoleon was stopped by winter and we aren't all French.

Hey I just met you, and this seems crazy. I have Alzheimers... Hey i just met you.

(Pretend that your adopted, and no one loves you) Knock Knock Who's there? Not your parents.