Why is it impossible to travel faster than the speed of light? Because it travels pretty darn fast.

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A thin man walks into a Grocery Store. He trips, hits his head and is killed instantly. There are several children present and they are scarred for life.

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Hi? No!!!!!

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Q: What do you call a bunch of blondes standing ear to ear? A: A wind tunnel!

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Soccer...

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What's worse than an explosion? A nuclear explosion.

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Q:If an apple and an orange had a politicial debate, what would it concern? A:Nothing important.

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What did the guy say to the other guy? LOOK AT MY EYEBROWS!!!!!!!

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How dead people are in a graveyard? All of them

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knock, knock come in

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Q: Why was Sally crying? A: Because someone punched her in the face

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Knock knock. Who's there? Super Monkey Ball. Super Monkey Ball who? No wonder it's super.

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What is Ciaran Wilkie Gay

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Ed has spent all his days on the farm. It was the farm of his father and grandfather before him; long have they prospered from the fruits of this land. He has a wife and 3 beautiful children, all of whom live happily on the farm. Ed still manages to keep an active social life, and has lots of interesting friends. His best friend is Moe. As a young man, Ed had spent a few years living in the city for his studies. Moe lives in the city, and he knows Ed from College. One day, Moe came out to the farm to have lunch with his old friend. After lunch, he and Ed took a walk around the farm. They passed by the horses, the chickens, the pigs and finally they came to the cows. Ed looked at Moe, and he saw that he was focused intently on a single cow. "What's the matter, Moe?" he asked. "That," Moe said, "is one skinny cow."

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Are you from Nebraska? 'Cuz you're the only ten i see.

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What's good about freedom of speech? Only the idea. Try saying something about Muhammed or calling a cop a power-mad taxman.

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What's worse than eating brussel sprouts? Getting raped by a brussel sprout.

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What do you call a man with a black book? I don't know.

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42

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I was trying to think of a joke to write, but then I became unsatisfied with my creativity and began to spiral into a depressing tangent of thoughts. I just took 37 Ambien, and have approximately ten minutes to live. Instead, I will spend my last moments writing goodbye messages to friends on Facebook and longingly looking at images of the past. Goodbye, world.

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Roused are red violets are blue I just s*** in my own poo

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XD I must like, really be into you, God I cannot breathe XD, that is like the most disgusting thing I have heard in my life, but coming from you that just comes out so quaint! XD

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What's the deal with airline food?

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What do you call a black man at the front of a bus? A bus driver

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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