Why did the leper go back into the shower? he missed a spot.

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Why didn't Jimmy go to school? Because his school was nuked.

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What do you call someone too young to drink? A minor

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Why was the boy rolling down the hill? Cause he's stupid

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Reed is poopin

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Penisland

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what do you call a man with three eyes and eleven fingers? his name

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What doesnt have arms and legs? A brick.

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Jesus was nailed to the cross by Roman guards... His disciples were kept behind a line of guards and they could not hear Jesus speak. They can see he was saying something, so they had to get closer to hear what he was saying. John dodged a guard and ran towards Jesus, but a guard cut his leg off with a sword... Peter ran for it and got past John but another guard cut off one of his legs... Matthew saw this opportunity to dodge both guards and jets past both John and Peter and gets to the foot of the cross... Jesus looks down at Matthew and says, "Matthew.... I can see your house from here!"

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Q: What's different about a boy and a girl? A: Nothing. There used to be a notable difference but nowadays you have to strain in order to tell them apart.

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A man is about to rape a girl. Before penetration he carefully and correctly applies a condom as he practices safe sex and is not yet ready to father a child.

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Where did Suzie go during the bombing? Everywhere

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How do you find Will Smith in a snowstorm? You look for the black guy.

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Have you heard the joke that they don't tell retarded people? You haven't? Well then alright let me tell you because it's actually quite amusing.

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Why couldn't the young girl play outside with her friends? She was bed ridden with terminal cancer.

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whats red and black and green all over? a paint job gone bad

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What's wrong with woman Everything

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What do you call a blonde girl with ponytails? A cheerleader.

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whats the difference between a pair of shoes, and a computer. alot.

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What happens when you drop the soap in Prison? You pick it back up and go about your business.

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John - hey do you have tickets to see Oasis? Sam - No I bought green day tickets intead. John rolls his eyes at sam very dissapointedly then proceeds to go home. The next day Sam phones John excitedly telling him he traded his Green day tickets for Oasis tickets, a smile appears on Johns and Sams faces, not that they can see each other, they both then put the phone down. An African died. Green Day are a bad band.

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Why does dan leave Amy? Because dan is in another relationship and did not want to be unlawful to Amy.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? The chicken crossed the road accidentaly as chickens are absent minded.

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Christopher Reeve walks into a room.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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