i am a duck. are you a duck. yes i am a duck.

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What's the difference between a lamborghini and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a lamborghini in my garage.

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What's big, white and can't climb a tree? A refrigerator.

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Knock Knock, Who's there? The Police. *No Answer* The police then give the S.W.A.T the signal, bust down the door, and kill 15 high profile targets issued by Liberia. The man who did not answer the door was Carlos Pedrouez, a serial killer, meth addict who has been apart of the Arizona sex slave trade for over a decade. The world can now sleep softly. The door was also red.

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A man walks into a bar and says "Ouch."

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What's dead? Your mum.

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what ya call e dong withb eyes peeneyes

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Q: Why did the man have no legs? A: He lost them when his humvee hit a roadside bomb during his last tour in Iraq.

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-Knock Knock -Who's there? -Traveling Salesman.

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-How do you pull a prank on Helen Keller? -Stick a plunger in the toilet!

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A moose walks into a corner store and asks the lady where the Mashed potatoes are. The lady working behind the corner says "Down Aisle five..." The moose goes down aisle five and there are no Mashed Potatoes. -Tyler the Creator

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Penis.

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What do you get when you kill a black man? The death penalty.

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what do u call a person who reads anti.jokes a hipster

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Why didn't the pharmacist set up his business in the jungle? Because setting up a pharmacy in the jungle is not a viable business option.

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why do black people hate aspirin? Its white, it works, and you have to pick cotton to get to it.

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What's the difference between Barney the dinosaur and Santa? Barney loves you.

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What is invisible and smells like bananas? Monkey Farts.

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What did Santa get for a young boy? A gun. What did Santa get for the young boys sister? Nothing, the boy shot Santa. Who sent out presents the next Christmas? Not Santa.

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What do you call a disabled Jew? His name

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Why did elmo jump of the cliff caus he was depresed

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How come Pluto and Goofy are both dogs, but Goofy can talk and Pluto can't? Goofy sold Pluto into slavery in exchange for the power of human speech.

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What do you call a black man flying a plane? A pilot.

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Whats the square root of x^2? Variables cant be gay

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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