What did the elephant say to the goldfish? Nothing. Animals are unable to speak and fish aren't able to live on land

There once was a man from berlin He knocked on a door to go in He got such a fright When the house did ignite That he never went knocking again

Chuck Norris' farts are silent and deadly. Deadly because he's Chuck Norris, silent because his butthole is extremely loose

how does a zookeeper build a snowman. same as everyone else

What do you call an angry black man? Angry.

In Soviet Russia, Joke isn't funny!

Boobs are nasty!

An American man and a Chinese man have a conversation. The American man asks the Chinese man after a couple of minutes of speaking, "How long have you lived in the United States?" The Chinese man replies, "I moved to the United States when I was ten years old."

What's Worse then an apple with a worm? The holocaust

How many monkeys can play COD at once? It depends on how many controllers you have.

How so you find out if a black woman is pregnant? Have her take a pregnancy test

A day without sunshine is like night.

Your mama's so fat her patronus is a cake!

The man who ran behind the bus got exhausted. The man who ran in front of the bus got tired. The first one survived.

A seal walks into a club and gets hammered.

Why did the rabbit like to wear shoes? It doesn't.

Why can't Stevie Wonder drive? There is no steering wheel at the back of the bus.

Why did the chicken cross the street? It didn't. It got hit by a car.

You say you can read me like a book, well the jokes on you. I am not a book.

What's the worst thing a 13 year old could do? Have their Bar Mitzvah in Nazi Germany.

What did one wall say to the other? Walls don't talk.

Friend: I hope you burn in hell -.- Me: I hope you step on a leggo in the dark Friend: *gasp* take that back

What's big, white and can't climb a tree? A refrigerator.

what's red and fluffy ... red fluff

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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