An Asian oceanographer went scuba diving in the Pacific Ocean. Three days later the coast guard found his remains torn apart by sharks.

You are in England which has a law about not moving traffic when these idk some kinda swans cross the road. You see a fat woman in a car and she is waiting for the swans to cross the road and she can't drive the car else she would get in trouble by law. What do you do? Feed her

So two muffins are in an oven. They get baked.

What do you call an asian guy in a police uniform? A police officer.

My wife crashed the car while listening to Adele last night. She ended up rolling in the jeep.

roses is red violet is blue i will smack you

Why does Kony kidnap infants? To create an Infantry

stop it ryan vallee

Person 1- your face is a stupid joke Person 2- you're right, because it's not a joke its a face

womens rights

Whats green and fuzzy, and if it falls out of a tree you'll die? A pool table.

How are eagles and jellyfish the same? They both fly but jellyfish don't.

How did the blond die? Substance abuse

What do you call a black man on the moon? An astronaut.

How big is Justin Bieber's penis? 10 inches, and its in his ass, and its actually Usher's penis

Your mother

Why was poor justin killed His mother kicked him into a pool of blood-thirsty aligators.

What's worse than a School Bus accident? The Holocaust.

How do you get a giraffe in a fridge? Open the Door, put the giraffe in, close the door How do you get an elephant in a fridge Open the door, take the giraffe out, put the elephant in, close the door There is an animal meeting, one animal doesn't show up. Which animal didn't come? The Elephant, it's still in the fridge You come across a crocodile infested river, how do you get across? You swim across, the crocodiles are at the meeting, Weren't you listening?

What's the difference between a plum and a bunny? They're both purple. Except the bunny.

A blind man walks into a bar....and a chair....and a table....and a wall....and a person... etc.

What do you call a group of black gentle men running down a hill A group of black gentle men running down a hill

Knock Knock Who's there? A Kid With ADD A Kid With AD- Oh Look! A Squirrel!

A van drives into a car. An hour earlier, the man who was driving the van walked into a bar.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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