why did the man scream? he stubbed his toe on a door

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding two worms in your apple.

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How do you kill one Jew. A gun. How do you kill a thousand Jews. With a millon angery germans.

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what happend to the ghost? he dissapeared! :)

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"Knock Knock" "Who's there?" "Jeff" "Jeff who?" "Jeff Johnson" "From the office?" "No I work at the dehli" "The one on 6th avenue?" "No, the one on Park." "What do you want?" "Could you open the door?" "No, I don't know you" "Isn't this Mr. Walter's house?" "No, my name is Roger Stevens" "I'm sorry I must be at the wrong house" "What address are you looking for?" "15322 N Gary street" "This is 15323 N Gary" "Oh I'm sorry" "Try knocking across the street" "Thank you"

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How do you punish Helen Keller? Set a restriction on something she enjoys that is equal to the degree of her misbehavior.

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Why did the chicken attempt to cross the road? To retrieve his dead relatives in the middle of the street.

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Why didn't the depressed girl go on facebook? She was dead

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Q: what happens when you throw a red rock into a blue lake? A: a splash.

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Why did the boy fall off his bike? Because he fell off his bike.

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How do you make a chicken fly? Throw it

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whats the diffrence between love and faling in love when u love some one your not falling

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because its coop was on fire.

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Where does Frosty the Snowman keep his money? He doesn't keep it. His lifespan is too short to make significant compound intrest.

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What do you see when the Pillsbury Dough Boy bends over? I don't know, I don't look when he bends over because I don't like him like that. He's just a friend, that's all.

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There was a man who bought a cat. He fed it well. It got so fat.

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What do you call a chicken with its head cut off? A dead chicken. Most likely ready to be cooked/eaten

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Tom Petty walks into a bar and the bartender says, "I'm sorry, you are visibly intoxicated. We cannot sell you liquor." The bar explodes because someone said no to Tom Petty.

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How many babies does it take to paint a house? Depends on how hard you throw them.

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roses are red, violets are blue, hey reed and steven, we should hang out

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Want to hear a joke about my penis? Nevermind it's too long.

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What's the difference between unicorns and black people? Years of slavery.

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Why did the man jump off of the cliff? Because he was suicidal.

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Three children are celebrating Christmas, Joey got a toy train, Janey got a barbie doll, Know what Jimmy got??? Cancer.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops