What's black and white and red all over? A cow being processed

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You know George Washington? He died.

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You have a birthday party and invite 5 celebrities: Britney spears, Lady Gaga, Hulk Hogan, Barack Obama, and Oprah. Meanwhile, there is a cow in a nearby pasture pooping.

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how do you make a family tan? You burn them in the house.

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here i am sitting here staring at the wall and beside me is a doll, oh no its moving, i hope it doesnt lick tht popsicle, oh no it just licked tht popsicle, oh no oh no

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What was the color blind boy's favorite color? I don't know? neither did he

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guns don't kill people. casey anthoney kills people.

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A Jewish man overhears another man making a joke about the Holocaust. The Jew says, "Hey! You! My father died in the Holocaust!" The other man says, "Oh, I'm sorry. What camp was he in?" The Jew says, "Camp? No, my father had a heart attack."

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What do Laura Bush and 9/11 have in common? George Bush did them.

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What would people call Michael Jackson if he became president? Probably President Jackson

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What's flatter than a pancake? The baby I just ran over.

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A black man and a black woman are in a car, who's driving? The police.

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What do you sit on, sleep on and brush your teeth with? A chair, a bed, and a toothbrush

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French people

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Knock knock Who's there Heyyyy mackane!! ;)

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What do you call a horse with wings? Nonexistant. Welcome to the real world kid.

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What do Chuck Norris and Oprah Winfrey have in common? They are both white, male, good actors, white, rich, and white. Except for the eagle.

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The man goes to the doctor after just losing his job because his company went under because of the econmic crisis. His house is being foreclosed because without the money from his job he can't afford to pay for his house. His girlfriend also just left him because of recent conflicts about money issues and how she wanted a family and with him jobless it was just out of the question. Man: "Doctor I could really use some good news" Doctor: "You have aids"

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friend: whats in the box? me: shhhh, its your mom... im saving her for later.

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What did the deaf, blind, poor orphan get for Christmas? Cancer

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why did the boy dress up like a girl? because he has autism.

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Women Voting

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Sex. That is all.

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who eats pencils asians

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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