why does andy thomson speak that slow because he speaks that way

How do you confuse a blond? Ask her to solve ( [3x - 3x^2 +1]^744 ) x ( [- 3x + 3x^2 +1]^745 )

What do you say when you wake up in the middle of the night to see your TV floating in midair? "I should probably lay off the hallucinogens."

A boy and a girl are playing catch. Why did the girl drop the ball? She had no arms. So why did the boy throw her the ball if she had no arms? Cause he's a Dipshit

Rosea's afre rewd Voleasts a/ere bluejw I ahve parkinson's dise'ase it ttook 4 hoiurs to w'irite this

Kittens.

How many potatoes does it take to kill an Irishman? None

Knock Knock Who's there? I'm deaf. I'm deaf who? What?

2 blonds are driving on the road on their way to Disney Land. They come to the sign that says Disney Land left so they started crying, turned around and went home.

What do you tell a girl with 2 black eyes? You should ice those to preven swelling aron the eyes

Have you ever had Ethiopian food? Neither have they.

What do you call a douche with no arms or legs? A device for washing out the vagina as a contraceptive measure.

Q) what happens when you tackle someone with 2 legs? A) you fall over

how did the bling man cross the street? He didn't half way there he tripped and got ran over by a car.

What do gay horses eat?........ Cheese

Why is a giraffe's neck so long? Because its head is so far away from its shoulders.

what do you call someone that is dying of malaria? someone that should consider visiting a doctor.

Why is the grass always greener on the other side? because they have a landscaper.

Shit.

Tomorrow, today's yesterday.

What's the difference between 10 dead babies and a Ferrari ? I don't have 10 dead babies in my garage.

The size of Idris Elba's penis

69

Penis

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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