Roses are red, Violets are blue, I wanted tobe cool, But I look like you

thumb_up thumb_down -19

I am fine, hungry but otherwise fine, I sometimes wish that things that come easy to you, did the same for me or others, excuse me, going to grab a bite, I hope we can chat here for a bit, it is not a chatting site the least. Say? Are you still burning mad at me? If not ill gladly give you a call, but if this is a ploy you are scheming in order to gain my trust I might be killing myself.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

if someone chucks skittles at u and says "taste the rainbow!!!!" chuck m&ms at them and say "Im not afraid!!!!!"

thumb_up thumb_down -21

What's better than finding Jesus in your room? Finding Chuck Norris in your bed.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

If you're American when you go into the bathroom , and you're American when you go into the bathroom, what are you when you're in the bathroom. Ha, joke is on you because Americans don't pee.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

You know whats annoying? Steve

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Josh, this is your mother. I was wondering if you wanted me to bring my lube and strapon to bed tonight. Wait never mind about the strapon because i have my dick to use.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

What's white and sticky.... Jizz

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Rap. Skate. Smoke.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

If you have 5 bucks and Chuck Norris has 5 buck you both have 5 bucks

thumb_up thumb_down -31

A man walks out of a bar. He didn't bring his driver's license, but managed to do a grand theft auto and unfortunately, crashed on the way home beacuse of a tree. Also, killed 12 people by car

thumb_up thumb_down -31

What came first, the chicken or the egg? The chicken. The chicken always comes first, that's why the egg never comes at all.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Your flying on a canoe, and one of the wheels breaks off. How many pancakes does it take to fix it? Trick question there is a gorilla on board.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Bigfoot, the loch ness monster, and self-respecting Justin Beiber fans are all the same, your told they exist, it's not true.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Why DIDN'T the chicken cross the road? Because it got hit by a bus

thumb_up thumb_down +10

two peanuts were walking down the street one was assualted

thumb_up thumb_down +10

why didn't sue come to her son's baseball game? because he doesn't play baseball, he lost his arms in a horrible plane crash. besides, sue died in that accident anyway.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

So, Ryan Dunn was driving under the influence of alcohol. The result of this action proved to be fatal for both Ryan and his passenger; who happened to be his close and personal friend.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Hurr durr, I shit my pants.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

A young boy walked into a hardware store and asked for a long weight. Luckily, the shop owner was kindly and brought the child up to speed on the process of hazing.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What do you get when you see a black man writing? A man devoted to getting a education.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

whats the same between a mouse and an elephant? They are both small except for the elephant

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What's worse than shitting whilst fucking? Losing your eye! Kelvin Yang

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why were my arms so tired after I flew in from the coast? Because the stewardess, god rest her soul, failed to latch the door securely.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops