What happened when Stephen Hawking tried to go down the stairs? He fell and suffered minor injuries.

Whats worse than a worm in your apple? Two worms in your apple...

Why did the McCann's parent's leave the window's and doors open? Because Portugal is a very hot climate, And they expected the place they were staying to be safe as lot's of tourist's stay there throughout the year.

Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't, a car ran him over.

What's worse than a worm in your apple? Two worms in your apple.

Why did the boy jump of the cliff? He was following the others

What do you call a guy sleeping with little boys? Michael Jackson

Why was the black guy sad? Because he has a knife through his throat

Why didn't the African kid eat lunch? He wasn't hungry.

A lion, a leopard, a sheep, and a flesh eating New Zealand parrot stalk, trot and fly, respectively, into a bar. The parrot lands on the the sheep's back and begins to tear into its flesh in order to reach the succulent deposits of fatty tissue located around the sheep's kidneys. "Ouch!" Said the sheep. "Why would you do that? Oh, the pain! The pain!" "Squak!", Replied the NZ parrot, wiping blood of its sharp, hooked beak on the counter. "I think," Began the lion, "This parrot from New Zealand is hungry for fat from a sheep's soft, woolly back." The sheep's wool was now damp with blood. "Perhaps this parrot from New Zealand wants sheep fat from its soft woolly back." "Ah!" Said the sheep. "This parrot from New Zealand wants sheep fat from my soft woolly back!" "Yes", Replied the lion. "You could also say..." Started the sheep, "That an NZ parro-" The sheep did not finish his sentence. He died from his wounds. The lion left. The parrot flew off to tear up some windshield wipers. And the leopard stashed the sheep carcass in a tree branch for later consumption.

What do you call a horse with a missing leg Calling it names could be considered animal abuse and should be reported immediately

I like your words "He without an equal, also stands alone was it?"

How many apes does it take to put in a light bulb 3

Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

knock knock who's there ... '*Opens the door slowly* SUPRISE BUTT SEX!

What are the biggest ants in the world? Ants under a magnifying glass.

So a man walks into a bar. Unfortunately, he had brittle bone disease, cracked open his skull and bled to death on the pavement.

Why do midgets laugh when they run? The grass tickles their balls.

Stephen Hawking walks into a bar

How do you get Jake snow to shut up? Say shut up

Where did Jenny go after the explosion? Everywhere

What do you call a boomerang that doesnt come back? A stick.

why did the man sell the car and bought worse one? it' s his hoby to restore cars

Confucius says, I hear and I forget. I see and I remember. I do and I understand.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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