Did you hear the joke about the man and the serial killer? Neither did the man since he was stabbed repeatedly and thrown into the bottom of a lake.

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A man walks into a bar. After recovering, he sues the bar for it's irregular glass doors.

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You grand mothers so old she going to die soon.

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A farmer accidentally trips his wife. She falls down the stairs and the farmer is quickly arrested for murder.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? it was thrown

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Roses are red Violets are blue I'm bad at poems... Nice t*ts

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Roses Are Red Violets Are Blue If it wasnt for christmas We would all be jewish.

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How do u get a baby to stop crawling in circles? Nail its other hand to the floor

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What's the difference between a good anti joke, and a bad anti joke? There literally is no good anti joke.

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roses are red, violets are blue, im a bad poet, text me. LMFAO

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i'm hard

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Do you like fish sticks? Yes. Me too.

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Q: How do you make a baby float. A: Put it in a blender and add ice cream.

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Knock Knock. Erm, sorry to be weird, but can you perhaps use the doorbell, because it's new and has a novelty chime. I'm proud of it and get a little chuckle everytime it rings in the vain hope that, perhaps you, the visitor, may also find it entertaining. Who's there anyway?'

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What did one Teacher say to the other teacher? Nothing. The first teacher has a horrible drinking habbit which is getting out of hand, He beats his wife and children each night after his drinks at the bar. His parents have stopped all contact and he found some divorce papers in his wifes draw, also saying she would be getting full costudy of the children. He has lost the majority of his friends and didnt want to loose another one, and kept his problems to himself.

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Recycled jokes are about as good as a scalar roundabout... [L]

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. I have alzheimers. Cheese on toast.

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Q. Which famous celebrity has had the most children over the last 10 years? A. Michael Jackson

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What is worde then swallowing a slipper? Swallowing a granny to catch the slipper

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What happened when the man fell off the boat? He went into the water and was viciously mauled by 5 alligators then ran over by another boat.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? Why? Because she has no arms. Knock. Knock. Who's there? Not Sally

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What did the alien say to the other alien? It's hard to say. They could use an inefficient form of aural analog communication, or a hyper-advanced form of telepathy. Either way, modern science hasn't brought us far enough to determine.

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Why don't you want to shout "Hi" to your friend Jack on an airplane? Because he's deaf and will not hear you.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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