Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because I hit her with a shovel.

Why is the sky blue? You like men.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he had legs.

Hey man, you the tall one! Yes? Do you understand me? No. But you do overstand me right? Yeah, I overstand most people.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other... Uh oh. A car just ran it over.

What do you call someone who can legally murder? OJ Simpson

Why did the white man beat the black man in a fight? The white man was bigger. Also, he was a black belt in Brazillian Jiu Jitsu.

A pirate walks in to a bar. The bartender notices he has a steering wheel in the front of his pants, so he says to the pirate, "you know you've got a steering wheel in your pants, huh?" The pirate responds, "Arrrrrrrrr, it's for me carrrrr."

How did the chicken cross the road? Assuming the vehicles yielded to the chicken, it looked both directions before crossing then proceded across the street while staying between the crosswalk lines until it had reached the other side of the road.

Q. How many men did it take to build a wall? A. None, the wall is already built.

What's Rupert bear's middle name? the

How many kids with ADD does it take to screw in a lightbulb Wanna go ride bikes?

Why did the boy fall off the purple cliff? Because someone cut of his legs and arms and threw him off.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

Jimmy's mom: Jimmy go do your chores now!! Jimmy: You shut your mouth, whore. Get your smelly ass back in the kitchen!!!

Yo mama so stupid, she signed an apointment with Dr. Pepper

Q: Why did princess Diana crops the road? A: Because she wasn't wearing a seatbelt

What do you call a black man with no job? Unemployed

Q: What did osama bin laden say to the worker behind the gas station counter? A: May I buy this bag of chips?

What's blue, white and red all over? Not a duck.

What's worse than aids? Being a virgin.

i just cant stand up to cripple jokes

Yar! What be a pirate's favorite football team? The Steelers. I'm originally from Pittsburgh.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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