Why did the elephant die? It was murdered by poachers for it's valuable ivory tusks.

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Dane Cook makes a joke.

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a man decided to climb a tree. he got to the top,raised his arms above his head and said "I am on top of the world ". after that he fell because he was not holding on to anything

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What is annoying and uses another language? Spanish class!

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If a large bear falls out of a tree, why would a giraffe also eat the cheese?

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What can a Giraffe have, that no other animal on Earth can? A baby Giraffe.

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What's the difference between a Jew and a Boy Scout? Boy Scouts come back from camp.

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p

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Whats the difference between a penis and a vagina? Pancakes,

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Q: what did the man with no eyes get for Chrismas? A: Reading glasses

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I've got a smoke dectecter, You died in a fire

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how many flys in a box six --sticksack

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Ask me about my wiener. How's your wiener? I don't have a wiener, I'm a woman.

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What did the dinosaur say to the human? For one, dinosaur's don't talk. And two, humans were not roaming the Earth during this time.

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Yes you better be sorry, I'm gonna suck my mums p e n i s tonight! - Dylan Hodge

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A blonde takes a math test it says find x? She circles x and puts there it is!

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Two Mexicans were sitting in the back of a car. They were carpooling to save gas.

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Kid 1 "Man this is the hardest poop i've ever taken." Kid 2 "Maybe it's because you ate the Happy Meal toys." Kid 1 "You know what? I think you're right. Commotion ensues as the toilet bowl fills with blood as the action figure has cut the inside of his large intenstine. He is screaming in pain. Kid 2 reacts quickly getting him to the hospital just making it in time before Kid 1 passes out. Thankfully he survives but has to get shrgery. Meanwhile, the family dog Buster decides to drink the blood poop water from the bowl and dies from poisining.

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"I'm gonna fight fire with fire!" "won't you just get more fire?" "True..."

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Why couldn't the baby play with the blocks? It died during birth.

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Q:Whats the difference between Glenn Close and a black widow? A:one is a person, the other is a species of spider.

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- How do you save a black man from drowning? - I don't know - Good!

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Why was the wife laying on the ground crying? Because she wasn't in the kitchen making a sandwich for her husband

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Roses are red... Violets are blue... I have Alzheimers... CHEESE ON TOAST

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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