Chuck Norris was once approached by a woman for whom he had to fight a man to obtain all while doing a mundane activity in an unorthodox manner. He promptly declined for he is married and told the man he only fights for self-defense. He proceeded to put his pants on one leg at a time like everybody else.

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Sometimes i like to stand on my chair and pretend that i am a carrot.

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guess what what ...

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To Daniel You must have been born on a highway cuz thats where most accidents happen

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What do you do if you see a cat crossing the street? Hit it of course!

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Why are many frogs green? Because yes they are.

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What did Jim do after the police gave him a ticket? He followed them home and used their children's limbs to rape them.

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Why didnt Steve Jobs make an iphone 5? He died

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Why did the Football Coach go to the Bank?? To Cash his Paycheck.

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So a bar walks into a man...

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Knock Knock No solicitors

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Q. Why doesn't a woman need a wrist watch? A. Because they're actually becoming generally obsolete with the advent of the cell phone.

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How many psychiatrists does it take to screw in a light bulb? Just one, it's not that hard.

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My captcha thing says "hulk smash" lol bahahahahahahaha, k

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Your mom is so stupid, she didn't know the answer to 2+5

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deez nuts

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why cant the kid find any friends? he was stranded in a desert.

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What happened when the lawyer went surfing? A shark came up and tore his leg off.

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How do you keep the crime rate down in a black neighborhood? Blow everybody up all at one time.

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I dunno, I dont grade love, I want to see you, touch you, bang you (sorry for not having the guts to use a nicer word, but I am tired and that is what I have in me now) And while that makes me sound like some hippy, I am very fucking picky about who I spend time with, and when. And I got no male friends, waste of time, why spend time with guys when I can spend time with chicks. Excuse me, just need my meds, speaking of sincerity, yeah I use medications, wont tell you what, but its well, not for my "mental disorders" I was born crazy, and I am going to die like I live: INSANE.

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why did the boy fall off his bike? because his mum through a fridge at him

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if you write treehouse backwards it spells gullible.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? A: Where's my tractor

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why did the chicken cross the road? to form the basis of an extremly popular jokewhich would grace the schoolyards around the world for centurys to come!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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