why did the crops die? because a deranged clown sprayed them with liquid nitrogen.

Three explorers are walking through the jungle when they are suddenly captured by a group of cannibals, the cannibals, going through years of culture and hereditary custom, kill the explorers, skin their bodies, chop them to pieces and cook their flesh, finally they eat it giving them a prosperous feast while the rest of the world is unaware of whatever happened in that jungle.

A quadriplegic walked into a bar, and... oh, whoops, nevermind.

Roses are black, Violets are black, Everything's black, I'm blind.

You can pick your friends, and you can pick your nose, but you can't eat your friends Nose it is!

What's the sexiest thing on a farm? It depends on what you find sexy, and your personal perception of a farm.

Why was Dr Who unable to travel back in time using the TARDIS? Because it's just a television prop. It isn't a real time machine.

Have you ever had Ethiopian food? No. Neither have they.

Matrix if it had been with (as planned at some stage) with Will Smith. Normal Neo: Yes trinity lets find the others. Smith Neo: Yo pretty lady, lets go find them ho`s and chicken and stuff, then we can like go surfin and driving nuts and all that crackin stuff and then we etc etc. Normal Neo:... Smith Neo: You tellin ME this is your world Smith? Im Anderson yo and the one, Im gonna bitchmack you all and then just whoop you all with my master blaster no kidding buddy I have yellow belt Kung fu yo! Neo: We have to do something. Smith Neo; Yo unless we make a real rap video first we cant do the proper stuff you, why is this place all so green, get some colaaas! Seriously first we get carlton and then he dances his crazy dance while I go boyAAAAAAAAAAAAAAZ with my rap ok?

Why did the blonde get fired from the M&M Factory Because she repeatedly wrote Ws

What is the difference between a pizza and a Jew?

An irishman walks into a bar and drinks 6 pints of guiness. He then drives himself home and savagely beats his wife and children.

Stop making fun of Stevie Wonder, you dont seen what he has.

What is the difference between a Camel And a Strawberry? A strawberry is red.

Two men and a woman go to lunch together at a restaurant in New York City. The first man says, "I'm glad that we're finally doing this." The second man says, "Yeah, me too." The woman concurs.

Lightning strikes 2 year old baby.

you will like this because i am black.

What do you call a middle-aged Polish man on Skype? A lonely man.

Why did the black guy cross the road? Because he was late for a meeting

Why didn't the man tip his waitress? Because he's a cheap bastard.

why did the boy fall to the ground? He was struck by lightning

A man agreed with a camel. The camel didn't agree. ... (This joke does only make sense in the Dutch language.)

Does Geico really save you 15% or more on car insurance? No, it's a scam.

What's the difference between jumping off of a 2 story building and a 20 story building? You're more likely to die from the latter.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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