How do you wake up Lady Gaga in the morning You poke her face

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Q: What's green and has four wheels? A: A green car.

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what is your moms favorite website? Wait did I say mom. Oh I'm not very sorry.

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a dog jumping up and catching a frisbi

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A man falls out of a boat. What happens next? Well, you would think he'd know how to swim, but due to his alzheimer's he didn't, so he drowned.

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roses are red, violets are purple, some poems rhyme, but this one doesn't

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Roses are red, violets are blue shut the hell up, and sit the hell down

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Who's obsessed with death and love to make jokes about it? The majority of the contributors in this site.

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How do you make a blond cry? You punch her in the face.

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Q. What did the chinease man say when he got flattened by a plane? A. Nothing, he died instantly.

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Two peanuts were walking down the street..........pepper.

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A man walks into a bar. Three hours later, ambulances arrived, because the man was knocked out. The man who saved was known as a hero, and was awarded a medal for his good deed.

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Why can't Michael J. Fox draw a perfect circle? Because it is humanly impossible to draw a perfect circle.

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A man walks into a bar. It leads to a fight that is enjoyable to watch.

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Q. How many men did it take to build a wall? A. None, the wall is already built.

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Do you know what the forest fire got for Christmas? Your house

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How many apes does it take to put in a light bulb 3

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A duck walks into a bar. The bartender asks the duck "What'll it be?" The duck doesn't respond because it's a duck and it can't talk.

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A horse walks into a bar. The horse says "why the short face?"

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 had bullied 6 and his old pal 21 back in his younger days.

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I found an iPhone on the ground at lunch during school. I said, "Wow, I can't believe I just found an iPhone on the ground at lunch during school." Later that day, my principal gassed the kindergarten classrooms with cyanide while shouting, "GO RAIDERS!"

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Why did the chicken croos the road? It didnt, my father caught him and cooked him for dinner.

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Why was the girl angry? She's PMSing. Give her a banana and stay away.

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What do you call a dog with no legs? It doesn't matter what you call him he isn't coming anyway!!!!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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