How do you kill someone? Shoot them. How do you kill someone with a knife? Shoot them How do you kill someone in a car? Shoot them How do you kill someone in a jet? Put the gun in the propeller

How many electricians does it take to screw on a light bulb? 1

Why was the Asian woman late for work? She was raped.

What's worse than sex with a midget? Non-consensual sex with a midget.

Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know ask a second grader.

Is this your pen? I wanna go to school, bye!

Knock knock. Who's there? The Gestapo.

Once a upon a time there was a girl named Cinderella. She rubbed a magic lamp and a genie appeared. Then a guy named Larry Harry walks into a laundry mat. 7 days later she died.

How do you piss off a redneck? You wait until he is done fucking his sister and then you steal his truck.

Roses are green. Violets are purple. Charlie Sheen. Looks a turtle.

How many easily offended people does it take to change a light bulb? Shut up, that's not funny!

FIONN'S ECONOMICS GRADE

Doctor, I keep believing I am stuck in the Matrix! Oh thats common, you know existencial crisis and so on but we got medications, you want the blue or the red pill?

How much wood could a wood chuck chuck, if a wood chuck could chuck oak? Well, If an oatmeal man could oat chuck oat, then a wood oat chucker could chuck oats.

why did the man take the bus to work he didnt have a liscence

Q: What did the Jew get for Christmas? A: Nothing you dumbass, Jews don't celebrate Christmas.

Why is the chicken on the road? Cuz he died trying to get to the other side.

Why did the boy do his homework? For fun.

What do you get when you mix a polar bear and a dog? A dead dog.

Did you know? that if you were to stretch out all your organs to see how far theyd stretch? youd die.

A horse walks into a bar. Just kidding, it's a panda.

anti-joke.ru - russian style

If your mom is a teacher and your dad is a gynecologist, how many pancakes does it take to stack on top of a dog house roof? 12. Because footballs don't have feathers.

roses are red voliets are blue u actule thought i would cry over you!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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