Q: What's big, green, fuzzy, and will kill you if it falls out of a tree? A: A pool table.

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yo mama is so fat she has more body mass than a skinny person

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What's the difference between a black man and a bench? The bench is an object and the black man is a human being.

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What did the hooker get for Christmas ? AIDS.

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what do call a dead dog in between two planks of wood? big sandwhich.

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You know you're drunk when you've spend a significant amount of time consuming alcohol.

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A king's son's birthday was coming up and the king asked,"Son i'm the king. You can have anything you want." And the son said,"Oh i'll have some purple ping pong balls." For his birthday he got a rollar coster, a pizzaria, a new car, and of corse, some purple ping pong balls. The next year the king asked,"Son, i'm the king, you can have anything you want." and the son said,"Oh i'll have some purple ping pong balls." And for his birthday he got a manchin, an iphone, a water park, and of corse some purple ping pong balls. One day, the prince was driving in his car and was in a terrible car accadent. On his death bed, his father asked him one final question,"Son, why did you want all of those purple ping pong balls?" And the son answered,"Well, i wanted all of them because-" and then he died.

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So there's this guy, and he's trying to screw in a lightbulb, right? Well, he did it. Hoorah. His wife was proud.

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What’s big, grey, has wrinkly skin, and a trunk? An elephant. Oh, you’ve heard this one.

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Gentlemen, when she says no, she always means yes. Unless, of course, your rhetoric is of a sexual nature.

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whats big, black and red all over? My mom when its that time of the month

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WNBA

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Nazi jokes are not funny. ANNE FRANKly they're mean! See What i did there?

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What happened to the soldier who go shot while fighting terrorists in the middle east? He died and had a proper funeral back in the town/city that he was born in.

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How did the Jew survive the Holocaust? Trick question he didn't

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What brown and squishy? um um um um melted kit-kats

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What's normally shaped like a rectangle, and is so thin, it gives people cuts? Paper.

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Want to hear an anti-joke? Yes. Well I'm not going to tell you one.

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How many black men does it take to change a light bulb? TO GET TO THE OTHER SIDE!

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Roses are Grey, Violets are Grey, I am Colorblind...FML

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Justin Bieber walks into a bar. He is soon kicked out as he is underage.

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Did you hear the one about the guy who went his whole life without ever telling a joke? He was still funnier than David Letterman.

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Scenario - Two astronauts are kayaking down the Sahara dessert. Question - How many pancakes does it take to shingle a doghouse? Answer - Purple, because ice cream has no bones.

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? Neither has he.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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