How many squirrels does it take to screw out a light bulb? None because squirrels lack the strength and mind set to screw out a light bulb.

An irishman walks into a bar and drinks 6 pints of guiness. He then drives himself home and savagely beats his wife and children.

why did the boat sink the captain drove it into a pile of sharp rocks

Why didn't the new baseball cap fit little Tommy? Because Tommy was decapitated

What's worse; twelve babies in one trash can or one baby in twelve trash cans?

So seriously you have never ever played videogames before?

What did the biker do when he heard about Kony 2012? He became a social activist and did his part by contributing to the cause.

A black, Kenyan man enters a race. He comes in second to last as he didn't practice as much as the other contestants.

What did Steven Hawking get for christmas? A bike.

HOW MANY CRACK-HEADS DOES IT TAKE TO CHANGE A LIGHT BULB? NONE, THERE AIN'T NO ELECTRICITY IN THE CRACKHOUSE!!!

Two great white sharks are swimming in the ocean together, one turns to the other to speak, but doesn't because sharks can't talk.

What do you call two spaniards talking in French. Bilingual.

what did the soup kitchen give people for christmas Meatloaf] -Fluzturnusturbusturcusterdustur

What's Red, Smells like Blue Paint, What tastes like the sea, and has been doused in the essence of the 80's? If you can come up with something, don't bother; This is a trick question. The space was to give you time to think. Forget your answer.

Tommy was excited to get a tattoo of a falafel on his wiener. He got skin cancer.

two kids see a girl naked in the woods They walk away promptly to their homes and tell their mothers.

What happened to Jillian when she walked out the door? She got hit by a bus A. Knock knock B. Whos there? A. Not Jillian

whats funnier than throwing a baby off a cliff cathcing him at the bottom with a pitch fork

How do you prevent a drowning..? A: You don't throw the black man in the portwater

Whats worse the losing your 3 kids, your lovely beautiful wife, and your trusty dog, all your belongings and in a house fire while you're at work? Nothing

whats black & white the colombo school shooting citv footage

A black guy, a white guy, and a Canadian walk into a bar what do they all have in common. They are all involved in my Joke.

a man walks into the doctors office and says DOCTOR!, DOCTOR! IT HURTS TO BEND MY LEG!!! the doctor replies then dont bend your leg and the mans great pain eventually heals

What did the milk bottle say to the other milk bottle? Nothing. Bottles can't talk you silly goose.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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