what's a snake that has no legs a snake

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What's blck and blue and doesn't like sex? The ten year old in my car.

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How do you rape someone? No, its a question. I don't know the best way to go about this.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was died...

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What happened to the man that walked into the bar... He walked into the bar

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What happened to the kids bike? It broke when he got hit by a bus

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Why did the Squirrel swim across the river upside down? To keep its nuts dry.

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Why didn't the plane crash... because of the wight male piloting it

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You are so dumb that you receive poor grades in school.

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What do you get if Justin Bieber and Miley Cyrus have a baby? The apocalypse

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knock knock whos there the game __i lost the game__

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A detective? I think more about that chip and dale thing, that was not funny, the classics are okay I suppose, but that newer thing detective-ish maybe. Uh... Do I get a clue? I have not like watched all of them.

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An Englishman, a Scotsman, an Irishman, a Welshman, a Latvian, a Turk, a German, an Indian, several Americans (including a southerner [but certainly not a redneck!], a New Englander, and a Californian), an Argentinian, a Dane, an Australian, a Slovakian, an Egyptian, a Japanese, a Moroccan, a Frenchman, a New Zealander, a Spaniard, a Russian, a Guatemalan, a Colombian, a Pakistani, a Malaysian, a Croatian, a Uzbek, a Cypriot, a Pole, a Lithuanian, a Chinese, a Sri Lankan, a Lebanese, a Cayman Islander, a Ugandan, a Vietnamese, a Korean, a Uraguayan, a Czech, an Icelander, a Mexican, a Finn, a Honduran, a Panamanian, an Andorran, an Israeli, a Venezuelan, a Fijian, a Peruvian, an Estonian, a Brazilian, a Portuguese, a Liechtensteiner, a Mongolian, a Hungarian, a Canadian, a Moldovan, a Haitian, a Norfolk Islander, a Macedonian, a Bolivian, a Cook Islander, a Tajikistani, a Samoan, an Armenian, a Aruban, an Albanian, a Greenlander, a Micronesian, a Virgin Islander, a Georgian, a Bahamanian, a Belarusian, a Cuban, a Tongan, a Cambodian, a Qatari, an Azerbaijani, a Romanian, a Chilean, a Kyrgyzstani, a Jamaican, a Filipino, a Ukrainian, a Dutchman, a Taiwanese, an Ecuadorian, a Costa Rican, a Swede, a Bulgarian, a Serb, a Swiss, a Greek, a Belgian, a Singaporean, an Italian, a Norwegian and 47-53 Africans walk into a fine restaurant. Fortunately," said the snooty maître d', "we'll let you come in without a Thai.

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What is white and can't climb trees? Toothpaste.

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Q: Why did princess Diana crops the road? A: Because she wasn't wearing a seatbelt

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Why the long face?" The horse says, "I have fetal alcohol syndrome."

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Q:what do you get when you get when you cross a dog and a human A: a human-dog hybrid with AIDS

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Why did the man apologize to the other man, after he had hit him with an axe? He didn't. The man was dead.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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How do u get a baby to stop crawling in circles? Nail its other hand to the floor

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Your momma is so dumb that her IQ is 3 standard deviations below that of an average person.

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What did the Farmer say when he lost his tractor? "Where's my Tractor?"

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The President walks into a local pub. Everyone shits their fricken pants because the President is here.

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Roses are red Violets are blue, Eat my anus with a spoon.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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