What's better than finding Jesus in your room? Finding Chuck Norris in your bed.

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what's the difference between a lion and an ostrich? they are both birds, a part from the lion

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Why couldn't the girl eat her pizza? She had no face.

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What do you find at a black guys yard sale? A bunch of reasonably priced items since he comes from a low income household.

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Why did the mexican buy 50 tacos? Because he was taking them to the orphanage where he grew up. Isn't that nice?

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What did the Orange say to the Apple? Hi

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Why was the pedophile in jail? For indecent exposure to a child.

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What junk did she have in her trunk? Mcdonalds because shes fat as hell.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding out your Grandmother died.

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Awesome! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> minecraftnow.us <

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So my friend told me to go shot myself I got my Canon and shoot myself The image came out very clean and profession.

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I'm rubber and you're glue, neither one of us say anything because inanimate objects can't talk.

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A women driver prepares to park in a small space between to cars on the side of a road. She safely and flawlessy parallel parks, and proceeds to enter a nearby coffe shop for an important business meeting.

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How did the person die? He got hit by a car.

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Why did Jimmy drop his ice cream? Because he was hit by a bus Knock Knock Who's there? Not Jimmy -thatcooltyguy

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms. Why couldn't she get up? She had no legs. Why did noone help her up? She was fat.

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what is purple and smells like poop? very weird looking poop

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Knock Knock. Whose there? The IRS. All your base are belong to us.

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Why did Tommy fall off the swing? Because he had no arms. Knock knock Who's there? Not Tommy.

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Did you know Helen Keller had a Playground in her back yard? Neither did she.

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The President, The Pope, and a small child are all in an airplane when the pilot announces that the plane is going to crash. They crash into the ocean and quickly remember that there is a life vest under their seats, which they promptly put on and safely inflate after exiting the cabin of the aircraft by pulling down on one or both of the red tabs.

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So, Ryan Dunn was driving under the influence of alcohol. The result of this action proved to be fatal for both Ryan and his passenger; who happened to be his close and personal friend.

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A cheerio gets a job at McDonalds and after working for a while, he gets employee of the month and goes to the district ball. While there, he meets a female(frosted) cheerio whom he asks out. She refuses because she only dates frosted cheerios. So, the male goes back to work for the next year, and his boss is happy with his work, so he asks him if he would like anything. The cheerio says yes, i want to be frosted. The boss says ok, i'll make you frosted, so now that he's frosted, he goes back to the ball. He asks the same female cheerio out, she says yes this time. He then asks her if she wants something to drink, she says yes. She wants some milk. So the guy stands in line for about 15 minutes, when he gets to the front, there is no more milk left. So he asks her if she would like some tea. she says yes. So he goes and stands in line for another 15 minutes only to find out there is no more tea. So then he asks her if she would like some punch, shesays yes. So after an hour of searching, he finds out there is no punchline......

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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