Phoebe: Joey, it's a birthday party. Joey: Yeah, but for a one year old. What's the point? The other day, she laughed for like an hour at a cup. Just a cup with a picture of Elmo on it dressed as a farmer. And he's standing next to this cow. And the cow says...."Elmoooo!" Joey: *starts to laugh* Yeah...that's a funny cup.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? The answer is not definitive and involves several factors including the size of the woodchuck, the woodchuck's teeth, the climate in which that woodchuck lives, and the tenacity of that particular woodchuck at achieving his goal.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What did the physicist say when he got his penis stuck in a test tube? Ah jeesh! I got my penis stuck in a test tube.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

whats worse than failing your maths test?

thumb_up thumb_down -1

A man walks into a bar. Splash.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What did the little girl say to her mother? Nothing, the previous day the little girl was kidnapped and rapped by two 40 year old men and was eventually decapitated...she will never speak to her mother again.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What did the homeless man find on the side of the street? A pile of dead babies.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Roses are stools, Violets are bums, sugar is knit, thank you, LSD.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

John: Knock knock Jack: Who's there? John: Whale Jack: I don't know a Whale, go away. John violently rips off Jack's cock in becaus he's sick of his shit.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What did the tramp get for Christmas? Nothing because he's Jewish.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Q: what did the man with no eyes get for Chrismas? A: Reading glasses

thumb_up thumb_down -3

A blonde walks out of a hair salon She had just dyed her hair.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Knock Knock Who's there Boo Boo who Boo I'm a ghost atleast act scared

thumb_up thumb_down -3

If I was in a room with hitler Osama bin laden and Justin bieber and a gun with 2 bullets. I would shoot Justin bieber twice

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding a bigger worm in your apple.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

why did the kid fall off his bike he had a serious illness which made it difficult for him to play sports

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Q: What has no color, no shape, no size, and was born in your mind? A: The thought you just had about this anti-joke.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

whats awesome? a blade of grass with a mexican hat and a revolver.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why can't Julius Caesar use a cell phone? Because he is dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

how many flys in a box six --sticksack

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she didn't have any arms

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Haikus are easy, But sometimes they don't make sense, Refrigerator Sex

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What happens when you tickle a rabid iguana? It bites you and you die.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops