Why couldn't the man sleep? Because he was a wax model in a museum, and as we all know wax models are inanimate objects thus incapable of consciousness and therefore incapable of unconsciousness as well. Many other inanimate objects are caught up in similar problems relating to their incapability to do anything.

What is blue and has wheels? A disabled Smurf!

Why is Joel always with Jamie? Because her incorrectly positioned eyes prevent her from seeing the true Joel.

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What did one tree say to the other tree? Nothing, trees can't talk.

What happens to a blonde girl who is buying drugs off of a drug dealer? Nothing, she was an undercover police officer trying to arrest said drug dealers on the street.

Knock Knock. Erm, sorry to be weird, but can you perhaps use the doorbell, because it's new and has a novelty chime. I'm proud of it and get a little chuckle everytime it rings in the vain hope that, perhaps you, the visitor, may also find it entertaining. Who's there anyway?'

Why did the chicken cross the road? No one knows because humans do not have the capability of accessing the chickens brain to receive their knowledge and what they were thinking about in the past.

Dont joke about the holocaust. My grandfather died there, he fell off the guard tower.

Why can't hank swim? Hank is a rock.

What did Elmer Fudd say when Bugs Bunny got away again? "Oh, dat dawn wabbit, I'ww get it some day".

why was the 6 year old boy crying? his mother had just passed away from terminal cancer and his stepdad caught him crying so he kicke hm in the face and told him to man up.

What's worse than finding a worm inside your apple? Finding an apple inside your worm.

What do black people do with M&Ms? They eat them.

Roses are yellow, Violets are purple, im not color blind you just cant read.

y was John so sad becaus his mom took his phone

When life gives you melons you may be dyslexic.

If a large bear falls out of a tree, why would a giraffe also eat the cheese?

What did the black man do to the white woman? I Dont KNow ask him

Knock, Knock... Whose there? panther panther who? panth-er no panths im goin' swimmin'

What's wore then finding a worm in your apple? Being the only person to survive a plane crash over Alaska, then having to eat your family in order to stay alive waiting for help to come.

A man walks into a bar He's an alcoholic and it's ruining his family

What is the worst party ever? Nazi.

Can we still mine for gold in the American River? No, anyone seen mining for gold is considered a hobo and all the gold is cleared out by random people in the 17 century

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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