A cripple and a Jew walk into a bar. They sit down and begin to discuss all the stigmas that they have faced their entire lives. The conversation goes on for an hour, at which point a black man walks in. Just then, the bar explodes and they all die.

What type of party do you throw when your fat? A baby shower.

What do you call a man whos had his arms ripped off in front of you? An ambulance, because with an injury such as this, you can die anywhere between 10 and 45 minutes

What was the pirate movie rated? PG-13

So, a man walks into a bar. His alcoholic habits are slowly tearing apart his marriage.

Q: What's worse than a pile of dead babies in a truck? A: A pile of dead babies in a truck with one alive in the middle eating his way out.

Why was the boy laughing at Sally? Because Sally was a man

whats worse then getting a parking ticket? the plague

What did the fish say when it swam into a wall? "shit"

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Daisy's are white, Metallica.

Q: Why did Jesus die for our sins? A: He didn't.

Knock knock Fuck off!

I have existed for over 6000 years and around vi0lating people long before you where ever born kid... You do not believe me you say? friendly r*pist neighbourhood Moral Man: You do not believe me? According to this DNA test... Welcome to papa son/daughter... Its time to make you a man/woman now, and then TIME TO MAKE YOU my BlTCH!

How do you fit 100 dead babies in a box? A blender. How do you get them out? Tortilla Chips. hehehehehehe

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? He got hit in the head with a brick.

Ernie: "Hey Jim, how many licks does it take to get to the tootsie roll center of a tootsie pop?" Jim then breaks down and cries deeply at Ernie's question as the fact that he was born without a tongue continues to slowly tear him apart.

What came first, the chicken or the egg? The chicken. The chicken always comes first, that's why the egg never comes at all.

Knock Knock... Who's there? Nine... Nine who? Nine Eleven.

What do u call something that's sticky and in a stick form? A glue stick :)

What's the sexiest thing on a farm? It depends on what you find sexy, and your personal perception of a farm.

Why did the boy have to ride the bus? Because both his parents died.

What's worse than burning your tongue drinking hot chocolate? Being shanked by a homeless man.

In the movie Sherlock holms, why is Sherlock Holms gay?? --------------Because he is chasing "blackwood"

An irishman walks into a bar and drinks 6 pints of guiness. He then drives himself home and savagely beats his wife and children.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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