If life throws you lemons, get under some shelter so you don't get pelted by flying fruit and worry about making lemonade later.

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i once bought a timeshare, guess what happened? i'm broke

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A guy walks into a bar. The bartender says "Why the long face?" The guy didn't respond because he was deaf.

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What does it take to make the best anti-joke ever? not this

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Why does it get hot after a basketball game? Because of the crowd all breathing out carbon dioxide and the high level of activity generating excess body heat.

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knock knock, whos there? the bum bum boys ready to dance :) ``~ ``sms

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Why did the elephant cross the road? To get to the other side.

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Why did the student fail his test? Because he has AIDS darragh hamilton

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Why did the baby cross the road? he was taped to the chicken

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What is so sad about 5 black people going over a cliff in a Ferrari? That was my Ferrari by darragh hamilton

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Hey, is that your corvette? No, I thought it was yours.

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There is a Asian a black guy and a white guy the black guy loves apples the white guy loves pears and the Asian loves Macaroni the white guy gets a apple the black guy gets a pear and the Asian has no lunch so the black guy kills the white guy for the apple and the Asian kills the black guy because he is hungry

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What's worse than having AIDS? A piano falling on your left middle finger.

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Whats the difference between a truck full of bowling balls and a truck full of dead babies? You can't unload one with a pitchfork

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Slowly being tortured to death.

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Whats sadder than 20 dead babies nailed to a tree? The Parents...

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What did the tree say to the plant. Nothing tree's cant talk.

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a

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What is red and fluffy?... Your teddy bear covered in blood...

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what did the jew get for Christmas? cancer. and aids

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What did the cow say to the chicken crossing the road? Moo

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What did Little Tommy get for chirstmas? An explanation that Santa is a lie.

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what is the difference between the dead baby and the sandwich? i don't put my penis into the sandwich before i eat it.

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What's the difference between ten dead babies and a Ferrari? There's no Ferrari in my garage.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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