Why did the clown fall off the unicycle? Because I shot him in the face.

A gorilla walks into a bar. It goes on a killing spree, and is promptly put down by animal control.

I just flew in from New Zealand, and boy am I tired. It was a really long flight and I found it incredibly difficult to sleep in those seats, so I didn't bother and kept myself awake watching in-flight films the whole way.

In particle-joke physics, the antijoke is the extension of the concept of the antiparticle to the joke, where the antijoke is composed of antiparticles in the same way that the normal joke is composed of particles. Furthermore, mixing jokes and antijokes can lead to the annihilation of both, in the same way that mixing antiparticles and particles does.The result of antijoke meeting jokes is an explosion.[1]

Q:What's brown and tastes like shit? A:Shit

You know whats annoying? Steve

Roses are red Violets are blue classic

What's white and sticky.... Jizz

Josh, this is your mother. I was wondering if you wanted me to bring my lube and strapon to bed tonight. Wait never mind about the strapon because i have my dick to use.

Rap. Skate. Smoke.

What do you call a black man flying a plane? A pilot. You racist.

What did the pregnant 16 year old get for her birthday? A miscarriage

A man is wrongfully convicted of murder and sent to prison. After a lengthy appeals process the guilty verdict is overturned and he walks away a free man.

What begins with "F" and ends in "uck"? There are multiple words or word combinations that begin with "F" and end in "uck," such as fat duck, so you dont need me to tell you, be creative.

Awesome! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> minecraftnow.us <

have you ever seen an elephant hiding behind a flower? No? well it must have been hiding pretty well.

I'm rubber and you're glue, neither one of us say anything because inanimate objects can't talk.

What came first, the chicken or the egg? The chicken. The chicken always comes first, that's why the egg never comes at all.

Bigfoot, the loch ness monster, and self-respecting Justin Beiber fans are all the same, your told they exist, it's not true.

A black man is trapped inside a bottle, how does he get out? He doesn't it is simply impossible for a human to get trapped inside a bottle.

Why did the monkey eat the banana? Because it was sexually confused

A young boy walked into a hardware store and asked for a long weight. Luckily, the shop owner was kindly and brought the child up to speed on the process of hazing.

Roses are red, violets are blue, I'm not good at rhyming turd

Did you know Helen Keller had a Playground in her back yard? Neither did she.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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