What did the librarian say to the three black men in the library? Nothing. Those three men were Harvard graduates and were very respective of libraries, and thier policies.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Have you ever been to Uranus? Well I heard it's nice this time of year.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

A black man, a white man and a Mexican walk into a bar. They have a beer, enjoy some pleasant conversation, then go home to their families.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why did the duck cross the road? It followed the chicken.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

what is orange and sounds like a parrot? an orange parakeet

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why did the schizophrenic chicken cross the road? He had to go to the clinic, the poor dear.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What do call something that looks exactly like a turtle but is not a turtle? A picture of a turtle

thumb_up thumb_down -2

a chicken crosses the street to ask a man: what is an anti-joke? the man replies: a joke the chicken responds: so why do they call it an ANTI-joke? the man answers: why did the horse walk into a bar? the chicken retorts: you can't answer a question with a question! the man replies: you're a figment of my imagination, nah nah nah nah i can't hear you.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What's the only thing better than winning a gold medal in the special olympics? Not being retarded.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Knock Knock Who's there? Your a slut

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why did Susie drop her ice cream? She was hit by a bus. Knock knock Who's there? Not Susie.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Once, a woman told her son to be a peach and fetch some sugar. Little did she know that a genie heard her. The next day, she was horrified to find her son gone and a peach in his bed.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Why did the baby cross the road? It was nailed to the chicken

thumb_up thumb_down -4

An Asian, a redneck, an Irish, and an Iranian walk into a bar. All but the Iranian were asked to go back to the parking lot and park their car to take up only one space.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What's worse than The Holocaust? CREED...

thumb_up thumb_down -4

BOB:john John:what? BOB:4:59 seconds to get rid of it

thumb_up thumb_down -4

what did the orange say to the other orange? we are both oranges.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

roses are red, violets are blue. you've got Alzheimer's, it sucks to be you

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Why were people laughing when Muhammad Ali signed autographs for his fans? He was making jokes regarding his Parkinson's syndrome in order to elevate an otherwise melancholy experience for the audience.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because you touch yourself at night.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What did the dubstep say? Wub.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What do black people eat? Food.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops