Yo mamma so fat she has to have anti biotics to keep her alive

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What's easier than a whore? Doesn't matter, your mom's a whore either way.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I'm bad at poems... Nice t*ts

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That's not mine! it's bigger and blacker! ...where have i heard this before?

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An irishman walks into a bar and drinks 6 pints of guiness. He then drives himself home and savagely beats his wife and children.

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SPILL THE BEAAAANNSSSS

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A teenage girl walks into a bar. She sits down and watches the TV up against the wall. The bartender walks by and says "Hello, do you have I.D." The girl says "No, I'm just here waiting for my ride." The bartender then says "Well I'm sorry to have to tell you this but you gotta be 21 or over to sit in the bar." The girl says "Okay, but is there anywhere I can wait that is safe?" The bartender asks "Why?" and the girl replies "Well, I've been hiding from my ex boyfriend. I just broke up with him an hour ago. He was very controlling and he is still not over me. So now I'm here waiting for my new boyfriend." The bartender says "What you have a new boyfriend already? Maybe that's why your ex was angry." The girl says "yeah, I know, oh look there's my ride. It was nice talking with you, have a good night."

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My brother gave my mom AIDS. My mom gave my dad AIDS. My dad gave my dog AIDS. My dog gave me AIDS. I gave my sister AIDS. My sister called the police because of the wild case of AIDS.

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A horse walks into a butcher shop and asks for two apple pies. The butcher says "sorry, but we don't have apple pies. It's a butcher shop." And the horse says "nevermind, I came here on my bike."

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Q. Which famous celebrity has had the most children over the last 10 years? A. Michael Jackson

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why did Kanye interrupt Taylor Swift at the VMA's? because he had a little too much scotch before the ceremony

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why did the mexican work for a lawn care service I don't know why don't you ask him

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Chuck Norris was in a staring contest with the sun. He's blind now.

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WHATS FASTER THAN INTERNET BUSTA RYMES

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What did the purple dragon say to the unicorn? He doesn't say anything to the unicorn because dragons and unicorns don't exist. Even if they did exist, dragons and unicorns can't talk, unless we're talking about cartoons. Also, even if it was a cartoon or whatever, do you really think a purple dragon has ANYTHING to say to a unicorn?! Of course not! Oh look at me I'm a cool talking dragon, I have something so important to say to this unicorn. Gimme a break...

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What did the black man do to the white woman? I Dont KNow ask him

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What did the cat say to the dog? Miaow. What did the dog say to the cat? Miaow.

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Did you hear about Osama Bin Laden? He's dead.

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What's the difference between a red shirt and a blue shirt? one is red and one is blue

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My dog has no nose. How does it smell? It doesn't

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What's worse than sex with a midget? Non-consensual sex with a midget.

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In Soviet Russia, this type of joke would be considered evidence to throw you into the gulag.

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Yo momma so old that she has started to look into an affordable life insurance plan to ensure all her final expenses are taken care of.

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Why was the fat man crying? He was sentenced to the electric chair for a murder he didn't commit.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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