Knock Knock Who's there? Can you sign for this package? Certainly

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why did stuart buy an ipad from the mall. because he wanted an ipad

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did you hear about the little girl who won first place in her school's spelling bee? she was hit by a bus

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What do you call the black stuff in between an elephant's toes? Depending on the location of the elephant it is either dirt or it may be tar in the case of an elephant in captivity.

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my own dog bit my penis off, it was then put down. it was the worst day of my life.

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if you have 5 oranges and 15 ice cubes, how many pancakes can you fit on the roof? red, because aliens dont wear shirts.

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Why did the boy jump of the cliff? He was following the others

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Do you know what would happen if Hitler was still alive today. Nothing he's not.

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Why did the chiken cross the road? It didn't, J-walking is against the law.

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Whats worse then sneezing on someone? sneeze on someone and find out

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why did the pyromaniac burn down the house? because he is a pyronaniac, he derives pleasure from burning things.

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Q. What do humans and jelly beans have in common ? A. Nothing.

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pull my finger (farts)

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knock knock who's there ... '*Opens the door slowly* SUPRISE BUTT SEX!

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A man felt a pain in his stomach. He went to the doctor.

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What is the difference between a fridge and a tree ? The fridge can't sing

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Because he was forced, along with thousands of his poultry counterparts, on a march to meet their imminent death at a mass slaughterhouse. Upon being beheaded and processed, the meaty corpse was delivered to a local grocery store and cooked into a wholesome family dinner.

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Why did the koala fall out of the tree? It was hit by a fridge.

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What is the difference between a Mexican and an a pile of crap? One is disgusting and unsanitary and the other is a pile of crap.

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I have existed for over 6000 years and around vi0lating people long before you where ever born kid... You do not believe me you say? friendly r*pist neighbourhood Moral Man: You do not believe me? According to this DNA test... Welcome to papa son/daughter... Its time to make you a man/woman now, and then TIME TO MAKE YOU my BlTCH!

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You can lead a fool to wisdom, but you can't make him think.

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What do you call a man with no arms or legs in the ocean? Bob

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Why do ducks fly south for the winter? because its to far to waddle

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knock knock come in

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops