A man walks into a bar, orders a drink, drinks it, and leaves.

A blond, brunette, and a red head are stranded on an island. They find a genie, who tells them each one can have one wish. They all wish for the same thing, to be back home with their families.

What do you call a penguin sliding down a hill how should i know.

Why did Jim go to the hospital? To get an autopsy.

How do you confuse your algebra teacher? Tell her to prove that she exists.

Why did the chicken get hit by a bus? He tried to cross the road.

How do you make an egg laugh? That is an irrational question eggs are inanimate object and are unable to laugh

Q:Why is rugby one of the safest sports to play? A: It isn't , it is in fact very dangerous.

Why did seven eat nine? Because six was afraid of him.

roses are blue violets are red crap i screwed up dont judge me

Why aren't there Olympics in Mexico? Idk Because everyone that can run jump or swim are already across the boarder.

why did the feminist cross the road? to suck a dick

I'm a burrito... With a big shirt.

A little girl meets a homeless guy named Ian McDermott in downtown Atlanta She then screams stranger danger and a nearby policeman comes and arrests the man.

Q. How many blondes does it take to put in a lightbulb? A. Cause of 7,8,9!

What did Tarzan say when he saw the elephants coming over the hill? Here come the elephants over the hill.

How did the Mexican get across the boarder? He applied for a student visa. He was a promising young scholar who had no trouble being accepted to a prestigious college.

Q. What happened to the dog when he was kick in the privates? A. Nothing he was neutered a year ago.

whats the difference between a baby and an onion? no one cries when u chop up a baby.

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a tomato.

Ask me if I am a tree. "Are you a tree?" No.

What did the man with candy say to the little boy? I have Candy.

Is this the Krusty Krab? Yes.

What do you hear when the world trade center collapsed?, no seriously I wasn't even three yet.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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