What's the difference between a panda and a baby? I don't have a baby in my freezer

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Two girls are in a car together. The one in the drivers seat is texting while driving. The girl in the passengers seat notices this and tells her the she should put it away in case of a risk of a collision. She apologizes and puts it away and the two of them drive to the store unharmed and continued their normal day.

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If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd put my cøck in your mouth. Submitted by Arsha K.

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What is small, cries a lot, and moves at high speeds? A baby stapled to a car.

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When life gives you lemons, you make lemonade. Well, that's going to be some horrible lemonade if life doesn't also give you water and sugar.

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What did the fish say when he ran into a cement wall? ....Nothing fish don't run What did the fish say when he swam into a cement wall? ...Damn

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Knock Knock Who's there? The KKK, got any blacks?

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A black man, a Mexican man, a Jew, an Asian man, and a white man get into a fight. Who won? Well since their dispute got all the way to a fight, I guess nobody really wins.

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What did the fork say to the spoon? To get to the other side.

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Can we pretend that airplanes in the night sky are like shooting stars? No, we can't.

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How could Jamie not come out and play? His mum had cancer

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how did the black guy get into school? he walked thru the front door.

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What did the man on the moon say? Nothing. He died because his supply of oxygen ran out.

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curtis campbell has no ear lobes so he bought some milk and drank it with his cereal.

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Why did Hellen Keller's dog run away? Because it could see and hear.

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It's weird how two of the SAME jokes can get different ratings.

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The other day a male African American approached me in a less than reputable neighborhood after dark and inquired as to whether or not I had a dollar which I could spare. I politely told him I didn't and apologized. He forgave me and we went our seperate ways.

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What do you say to a whore with two black guys? How much an hour?

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What do u call a white hourse with no ass Penelope

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Ask me if I'm on a horse. Are you on a horse? Yes, are you on a horse? No. Oh...

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What's black and hangs from a tree? A tire swing.

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roses are blue violets are red crap i screwed up dont judge me

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Yo momma so stupid she scored poorly on her SAT's in high school. She couldn't graduate college and now works a dead end job as a waitress.

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What do you call a horse with two legs? A kangaroo

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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