Q. Which famous celebrity has had the most children over the last 10 years? A. Michael Jackson

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Roses are red Violets are blue I'm bad at poems... Nice t*ts

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Why did the pumpkin when orange is not a letter in Spanish? Because moon shoes are der milf

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A dyslexic man walks into a bra drinks a bear and leafs .....

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, i thought violets were violet. hmph.

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A man that says YOU SUCK MY DICK YEAH!finds a woman that says YOU SUCK MY BOOB YEAH!They get married,The woman is actually a gay man!

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1. The name of your street 2. The name of your pet 3. Your favorite activity 4. The color of your eyes 5. The number of shoes you own Now fill in the blank with the corresponding number to your answers. "One day I was ___3___ my dog when a pornstar named __(1)__ ___(2)___ asked me how many times I can ___(3)____ myself. I said ___(5)___ times and the juice that came out of me was __(4)___."

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how do you upset an obese cat? you put her in dog sweaters

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What did one Teacher say to the other teacher? Nothing. The first teacher has a horrible drinking habbit which is getting out of hand, He beats his wife and children each night after his drinks at the bar. His parents have stopped all contact and he found some divorce papers in his wifes draw, also saying she would be getting full costudy of the children. He has lost the majority of his friends and didnt want to loose another one, and kept his problems to himself.

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When Chuck Norris claps, his two hands slam together, creating rather loud soud.

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What did the spoon say to the other spoon? Nothing, it is a spoon.

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A man decided it was time to quit his job so he put his 2 weeks in and went to look for another job.

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Whats the difference between a black guy at the beach, and a black guy at the zoo? One is at the beach, and one is at the zoo.

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roses are red violets are blue I lost my dog to typhoid it was an unfortunate case of bed luck

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Q: what did the man with no eyes get for Chrismas? A: Reading glasses

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What do you call a blonde at the beach? A dipthong.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To run away from the slaughter house.

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what looks, smells, and sounds like red paint? blue paint, I lied about it being red

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What's windy and sunny at the same time? The weather.

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Dear Six, Please stop spreading rumors about me and nine. I hear you two also do some pretty nasty things. Love, Seven.

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What did the farmer say to little susie? I have a gun. Get in the car and dont scream or i will kill you

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while in iraq i bought a brand new iphone from the black market...it was only $250....its was doing fantastic until i got a text...i herd a loud beeping noise and the it exploded in my pocket and now i no longer have a penis.

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Why are black people so good at sports? Through Dedication and lots of training of course

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A black woman and a white woman are in a bar. They don't talk to each other though because they don't know each other. THE END.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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