why did so many people die in the typhoon in the Philippines because they had to finish there math homework

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What did the Colombian say to the Peruvian? Quieres lleyo?

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What do you call a man with only one eye? Half blind.

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Yo mama so ugly, she has to work harder than most women to attract men.

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An armadillo walks into a bar, and shouts "I hear you don't serve armadillos." "That is correct," the bartender replies.

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How did the chewy cross the road ? it was stuck to the chickens foot.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Oh..wait...that's actually an anti-joke already...

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Kanye West walks into a bar. As he is a very popular celebrity, he is recognized instantly. The patrons mob him, asking for pictures and autographs. He is in a pleasant humour that evening, so he indulges them. Some laughs are had, he buys lots of drinks, and takes home two beautiful women. Such is the life of a celebrity. ...but that still doesn't make him happy.

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what's wose than finding a holocaust in your anti-joke? the potential offspring of courtney love and al gore

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What did the man say when he lost his car? Where the fuck did my car go

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Some poems rhyme, This one doesn't.

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Yo momma so fat, when she walks she wakes the dead -Ryan Vallee

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Knock Knock! Who is there? I am the milkman and I have your milk.

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I may be ugly, but I'm also dumb.

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Why did the little boy fall off his bike? His mother threw a washing machine at him.

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Why did the teenager drink a beer? Because it was actually full of sizzurp

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"Knock knock." "Who's there?" "Ben." Ben who?" "Ben Dover!" "Ben,it's been 7 years. I already moved on and have a new husband and family. Stop coming here or I'm calling the police."

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how do you keep a monkey from stealing your banana? shoot it

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How many wheelchair users does it take to change a light bulb? - They are not physically capable

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What did the man give his wife for her anniversary? Nothing. The man is a raging alcoholic and forget her anniversary due to his high alcoholic intake during the past few weeks. Even if he did remember he most likely didn't care after seeing his wife cheat on him with another woman putting his marriage into shambles.

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A woman sees a sign on a store that says "husbands for sale." Curious, she walks inside. The clerk says "These men will be perfect husbands, they'll cook and clean for you and see to your every need." Shocked, the woman calls the police and reports the store for human trafficking.

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Whats included in over 90% of all car crashes? A Car

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Why didn't the chicken cross the road? Because it was cooked with eleven herbs and spices.

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. The Clouds are white. Thank God I am too.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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