What do you call a black person who flies a plane? A pilot.. You racist bastard.

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What did the boy with no arms or legs get for Christmas many gift card to stores he liked

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a man walks into a bar... he was shot to death because he was a slave during the 1910s

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. . I am a whale

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Why is the chicken on the road? Cuz he died trying to get to the other side.

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What do you get when you mix a polar bear and a dog? A dead dog.

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What happened to the girl that thought she was a mermaid? She drowned, humans can't breathe under water.

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there was this kid who was perfectly well-adjusted, had most normal things a person needs and a generally good life. what did he get for Christmas. non-hodgkins lymphoma.

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What is a pirates favorite crime? Piracy, which is still a serious problem in today's society.

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Spongebob. "Hey Patrick, I thought of something funnier than 24." Patrick "Let me hear it." Spongebob "25"

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How many easily offended people does it take to change a light bulb? Shut up, that's not funny!

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Hearing the same holocaust joke seventeen times.

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Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? He died! Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? He was attached to the first! Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? He thought it was a game! Why did the fridge fall out of the tree? The branch broke! Why did Sally fall off her bike? She got hit by three monkeys and a fridge!

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What does a black person and ebola have in common? They both kill people

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what did the grandma do after she was pushing up daisies? washed her hands because gardening is a dirty activity

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What's the best thing about shrimp? It never goes bad.

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How many midgets does it take to screw in a light bulb about 4

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My friends and family all recommended me for alcoholics anonymous, but all i had to say is that my father didn't raise me to be quitter.

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youre in a room with justin bieber and a gun with 5 bullets..........

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what looks, smells, and sounds like red paint? blue paint, I lied about it being red

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Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the bird fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the squirrel.

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Why did the kids all eat their homework? Probably because they were starving to death and there was no other food source available.

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What's white, black, red, and flies? An airplane pilot with a battleaxe driven into his head

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.. A: Knock Knock B: Who's there? A: Not Sally

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops