Roses are red Violets are blue I'm bad at poetry Show me your titties

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Why did Hellen Keller's dog run away? Because it could see and hear.

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What happened when Johnny fell off of his bike? He suffered a very tragic and fatal brain hemorrhage resulting in a lower population by a minute percentile that is undetectable by the US Census.

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What did your mom get for christmas ? A stairstepper.

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Why does Snoop Dog carry an umbrella? For rain.

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Why did Dracula cross the road? To get to the other unbitten virgin.

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What does a Twihard, a Brony, a Belieber and a Gleek all have in common? They all ruin the Internet.

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Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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Why is my phone bill so low this month? Because you have no friends.

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chuck norris won the world series of poker using his superior knowledge of counting cards and calculating probability.

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Three drunk llamas wearing sombreros are walking down the street. They walk in silence, lost in their own thoughts.

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Q: Why was the child sad? A: because a doctor was taking bullet fragments out of his chest.

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Fat? Jesse Z

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When did the laughter finally die? When you started this joke.

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why cant black people swim? I dont know but they killed my family

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Why couldn't Dumbo fly? Because he had just been killed by an African Poacher, and dead elephants can't fly. This is very sad.

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A detective? I think more about that chip and dale thing, that was not funny, the classics are okay I suppose, but that newer thing detective-ish maybe. Uh... Do I get a clue? I have not like watched all of them.

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Your mama's so fat.... Her cerial bowl came with a lifeguard

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How do you starve a black man? Take away his current food stocks, and means of income.

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What do you get we you mix a ginger with gasoline? A forest fire.

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Why is Helen Keller a bad driver? Because her inability to see or hear makes her an extremely dangerous road hazard.

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"I vant to blood your suck!" warned Darcula.

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Want to hear something funny? Sure, what? 9/11

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To buy more crystal meth to fuel his addiction while his wife and children starved in the public houses.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops