Why did the wolf cry boy? Cause he was a pedifile.

Wanna hear a joke? Me neither.

Why did the old man lose his cane? He didnt. He had alzheimers

Stalin and Hitler went to Kmart to buy mini-toothpaste. Because they schleifen schlafanned on their way to the country club.

happy birthday! Its not my birthday! Oh i just assumed from your smell. That doesn't make much sense does it? It does. No it doesnt. Are you sure? Yes. Oh. Do i smell? Like chickens. Oh. I wish i were alive. What? Bobbing for apples? what? You smell like a toilet seat. Fine! You never spend time with me any more! I dont like you! oh. you know who nobody likes? Who? amanda burchell.

What do you call an armless legless man swimming? Dead

Looking's for free... Touching's for free.

What is the funniest shirt Emil heskey has ever worn? A shirt that had this joke on it

A man goes to the pound to adopt a dog and sees a very shaggy dog and says "WOW! Thats a shaggy dog I'll take it!" So the man takes home his new dog and decides to enter the dog in the towns anual shaggy dog contest. and wins. After winning the town shaggy dog contest he moves up to the county shaggy dog contest. theres no competition. Now the man and his dog enter into the state shaggy dog contest, the states shaggiest dogs are all competing. the man wins. Finally the man and his dog are in the prestigious national shaggy dog contest. The judge walks up to the man and says "your dog isn't very shaggy"

Why was chuck norris the anti christ? Christianity was being threatened....

Why did the bus drive off the cliff? It's driver happened to be a tomato.

There was a kid and one day he didnt do his homework...he failed.

How did Whitney huston die? By eating a turkey sasandwich and then put a car jump starter in the bath tub.

What did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? We are both lawyers.

Why couldn't Cait walk her dog? She's been paralyzed from the waist down since she was 5 after her and her parents got into a car accident and her parents died.

what do you do when life gives you lemons? take them, free shit is cool!

Why couldn't the Egyptian pharaoh solve the Rubik's Cube? He didn't know how.

Hellen Kellers dad put a plunger in the toiler and left it there. Hellen Keller went to use the bathroom and.. moved the plunger so she could take a shit.

Its a bird!! Its a plane!! No, its a bird.

Roses are grey Violets are grey I'm a dog

Roses are Red Violets are Blue In Soviet Russia Poem tells You -Ben

why'd the chicken cross the road It didn't, it was safely placed inside a chook house

How was the copper wire invented? 2 Jews pulling on the same penny!

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the cock was on the other side.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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