So seriously you have never ever played videogames before?

Why can't Molly ride her bike? Because she has no arms or legs. Knock Knock Who's there? Not Molly.

why did the boat sink the captain drove it into a pile of sharp rocks

Why didn't the new baseball cap fit little Tommy? Because Tommy was decapitated

What's worse; twelve babies in one trash can or one baby in twelve trash cans?

A black man is running down the street with a purse in his hand. He was trying to catch up to the old woman who forgot it at the restaurant. She was very grateful.

Your mom is so fat, that i don't think she's attractive anymore.

Q: What did the clown say when he got in a car accident? A: Nothing. He died.

A black man walks into a bar in an all white neighborhood. He has a couple of drinks, pays for them, and politely calls a taxi for a ride home.

How many flies does it take to screw in a light bulb? Two but I don't know how they got in there.

What is small, cries a lot, and moves at high speeds? A baby stapled to a car.

Q: What does a psychic have in common with a stone? A: The bible decrees that psychics are witches and should be stoned and something topical about the stone.

Why wasn't the elephant allowed to the pajama party? Because he didnt have any pajamas.

What did one lawyer say to the other? Your son's coming to my son's birthday party, right?

When life gives you melons you may be dyslexic.

Two girls are in a car together. The one in the drivers seat is texting while driving. The girl in the passengers seat notices this and tells her the she should put it away in case of a risk of a collision. She apologizes and puts it away and the two of them drive to the store unharmed and continued their normal day.

Why did the teacher fall on her face? She was shot in the back of her head.

What did the soldier get for his birthday? Shot in the face.

Tommy was excited to get a tattoo of a falafel on his wiener. He got skin cancer.

Why did the boy drop his ice cream? Because he got hit by a bus

So Colton Yepma walks in to Accounting and proceeds to read jokes

What do you call a blonde driving the wrong way down the freeway? Well that depends on what her parents named her, or whether she happens to have a nickname of sorts.

What did the horse say to the other horse? Nothing, they're both horses

How do you stop a black person from drowning?.. Take your foot off his head

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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