What did the man say when he saw a alien? "Look its a Alien"

What's worse than seeing another antijoke with "The Holocaust" punchline repeated? The Holocaust.

Lukas: can i have a cigarette? Scott: i dont know can you? lukas: may i? Scott: NO

A guy walks into a bar. The second guy ducks.

There is two guys named tard and retard on a boat in shallow water. they both fall off. Who gets back up onto the boat? - Obviously Tard because ur dealing with a retard here.

Why did the boy fall off the swing?

What do you call a dog with two tails? ...Depends on what you named it.

person 1. Did you here about the black guy who went to college? person 2.no person 1. either have i whats ironic is that they are both black

What’s brown and hairy? Brown hair.

so if your riding down a big hill in your canoe and your bicycle falls out how many pancakes do you have left? you would have 200 pancakes left --sticksack

like if your cool

Man goes to doctor, says he's depressed. The world is bleak and hopeless and life just isn't worth living. The doctor thinks for a second then smiles. "Treatment is simple he says, the great clown Pagliacci is in town. Go see him, that should pick you up." The man bursts into tears, sobs hysterically like a child, "But doctor," he says. "I am Pagliacci."

A blond is on her way driving to the airport when she sees the sign "Airport left." She made a left turn and got to her flight on time.

My wife asked me to prepare our son for his first day of school. He's a ginger so I punched him in the face, and stole his lunch money.

A dancer walks into a barre

Knock Knock... Who's there? Nine... Nine who? Nine Eleven.

Your big dick.

Wooooah! Thats literally the sound I made, anyway, can you like type the entire story in one setting, I feel weird, did you just try to hypnotize me? Anyway, are you trying to, woah, I am like high now...

what happens when you throw a green rock into a yellow pond. it makes a spash.

Life is confusing. Really how so? He just walked up to me five minutes ago with a pair of socks taped on both sides of his face saying humanity is screwed and ran off after peeing on my carpet.

What is white and can't climb trees? Toothpaste.

How did the Muslim pilot die? He had a fatal heart attack while flying over the Atlantic and as a result the 300 passengers died by drowning.

Roses are Black Violets are black I am colorblind, are you to?

What did the businessman do to get a promotion? He traded oral sex for his male bosses kind heart...

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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