What did the lawyer say to the Black man? Your case came through, the murderer of your wife has been caught

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It felt like it, no particular reason. Why did the hippo cross the road? Same reason as the chicken. Why did the Fred cross the road? He was with animal control, and a chicken and hippo had just been reported to cross this dangerous stretch of highway.

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Roses are red Violets are violet the last time i saw this poem i couldn't rhyme no more

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A man walks into the bar. It was typical day and nothing interesting happened.

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Q:What's brown and tastes like shit? A:Shit

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What's better than finding Jesus in your room? Finding Chuck Norris in your bed.

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Why didn't the kid return home after school? He was having a sleep-over with a bunch of his friends. Who all died from a robbery.

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what's the difference between a lion and an ostrich? they are both birds, a part from the lion

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How do you confuse a bar tender? You ask him how tender he is.

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Why do we have brown eggs? Because black people have sex with chickens

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What's more epic than a man in a gorilla suit? A man in a gorilla suit with a banana.

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You know whats annoying? Steve

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Why did the kid poop his pants? He was a baby

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What do you find at a black guys yard sale? A bunch of reasonably priced items since he comes from a low income household.

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If you have 5 bucks and Chuck Norris has 5 buck you both have 5 bucks

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Why couldn't the girl eat her pizza? She had no face.

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Why did the mexican buy 50 tacos? Because he was taking them to the orphanage where he grew up. Isn't that nice?

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What's black and white and red all over? A dead penguin

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What did the boy with no parents get for Christmas from his Grampa? Nothing because his Grampa had alzheimer's disease -Flap

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The last head of Satan, is oh but what you blamed upon Your faults, Your sins. The thoughts of Madness written here, yet potent enough to cloud Your thoughts.... Wait not forever children of man, as eternity is at its peak, the false prophet IS AMONGST US! But what side is he on? The last ditch attempt to protect humanity from a raging jealous vengeful God? Say it is not so! Say that darkness is not the only thing standing against you and eternal damnation... ...Yet you killed his only true child, you stole his name, his essence... Even his Identity... ...Even the Angels white are powerless to stop him, Your maker, Your true maker, for what is the grief of the holy, from which you took his only son... ...As you celebrate once and once anew... :...Merry CHRISTmas, to all of those of you all now left behind... Celebrate it well, as before the world reaches 2017, is where it all ends...

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Yo momma's so old, she lives in a nursing home and is on various medications that she needs to take to stay in optimum health.

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What did the white man say to the black man at midnight? It's really dark out.

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What did the Orange say to the Apple? Hi

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Why did the blonde's parents take away her car? She didn't pay for half the insurance like she said she would.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops