(Knock, knock) A: Who's there? B: Orange A: That is impossible. Oranges are inanimate objects and, therefore, cannot speak.

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Wanna hear a joke? It's here somewhere You looked :D There ain't jokes on Antijoke.com

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Are you ready kids "Aye Aye Captain" I Can't hear you "AYE AYE CAPTAIN" Ohh... Who lives in a pineapple under the sea "Spongebob squarepants" Absorbant and yellow and porous is he "Spongebob Squarepants" If nautical nonsense be something you wish "Spongebob Squarepants" Then drop on the deck and flop like a fish "Spongebob Squarepants" READY Spongebob squarepants Spongebob squarepants Spongebob squarepants SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS!

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a rabbi and a priest walk into a wall

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Once opon a time there was a black America He name was Bob

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A duck walks into a bar. Animal control is promptly called and the duck is released in a nearby park in a safe and risk free process.

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The awkward moment when you are reading these jokes and either it's not funny or you don't get it...

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What happened to your face It got hit by a bus By cheyenne

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I'm a blonde... rejected from Kaplan.

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What's the best way to piss off a feminist? R@pe her.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, The first line is spelled wrong, Ha, I tricked you

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*insert lame joke stolen from the top 10 jokes and act like it's original because I changed one word*

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A man dies and goes to heaven. This is an assumption based on religious faith.

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what do you call afish and a cat? a catfish

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What did the one midget say to the other midget? We r both small

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WARNING: this is a black joke Why does everybody hate darth vader? he is all black

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what did mickee utley say to micheal bane cnb

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You know what he said? How did you know what he said?

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had a good wank over anime yesterday xoxo dylan hodge

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There's a redhead, a brunette and a woman with green hair walking down the street. A man asks them how they all came to have such beautiful and vibrant hair color. The redhead smiles, runs a hand through her hair and replies "It's natural!" The brunette smiles, runs a hand through her hair and replies "It's natural!" The woman with green hair blows her nose, and replies "It isn't natural, I'm rebelling against society's conformist ideals. Also I was not loved enough as a child." She has a cold.

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Why did the car stop working. The owner was unable to pay the outrageous price for gasoline and was forced to ride a bicycle to and fromvwork every day. Over the course of several months without being run, the engine seized and was forever broken.

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Two cows grazing by the road. One says hey what's all this about mad cows running around? I wonder what is it like? The other says I don't know I'm a helicopter.

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What is the meaning of life? Bill Gates: Windows Donald Trum: Money Some poor kid:luck and rich parents.

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So, you got to take medications daily or die? Are you in pain my dear?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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