An American man and a Chinese man have a conversation. The American man asks the Chinese man after a couple of minutes of speaking, "How long have you lived in the United States?" The Chinese man replies, "I moved to the United States when I was ten years old."

You know what's worse than finding a real joke on antijoke.com? AIDS

What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Cancer

a farmer asked me "were is my pig?" and I said ' I got hungry" :()

The funniest thing happened the other day, it was like one went like this, and the other went like that, and then everyone laughed... ...Oh, its one of those where you would have had to be there to see how funny it was.

A man walks into a library and asks for a book on suicide. The librarian quickly picks out such a book and hands it to him, because to deny him the book would break the conventions of a library.

What is the hottest day of the week? Wednesday

Why did the bus driver tell the black man to get to the back of the bus? Because all the seats up front were full and its dangerous to stand in a moving vehicle

Who is a pussy? Jeff Misner

What do you call a white guy with 5 black guys. The owner of a basketball team

What happens if you fall of a cliff You die

knock knock whos there? your neighbor, dude im sorry but i swear i didnt see your kid on my drive way.

What do you call man with no limbs or a head? Your neighbor.

Why did the baby cross the road? Because he was stapled to the chicken.

Knock Knock Who's there? You know you really should have a safer way of finding out who is really on the other side. Now a days it's just not safe to ask, "who's there". I mean it could have been, Milkman, Plummer, or worst a Land Shark!

April showers bring... tornadoes that kill families

What do you call a Muslim flying a plane? A pilot you racist! Jk a terrorist

no really what are ur names?

Knock knock. Whos there? I am you dumbass im standing right next to you.

Why is the dog in the driver seat? Why is there birds making you filet mignon? Why is your toe blue? I don't know the answer. Go talk to your doctor

What do you call a black man on the moon? An astronaut you racist bastard

A baby seal walks into a club.

how do you confuse a brunette? paint yourself red and throw a fridge at her

Can you spot the polar bear Probably not because global warming killed it

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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