So a man walks into a bar, right?

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What's red and can sing? Elmo

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Why did the chiken cross the road? idk, i can't talk to chikens

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Your mother is so fat that when she looks in the mirror she is deeply upset by her appearance.

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What do you tell a women with two black eyes? Nothing, you've already told her twice..

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What's worst than a worm in your apple? Finding your mom in a porno.

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Q: How do you make Kobie Bryant cry? A: Kill his family.

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Knock knock? Who's there? Interupting Doctor? Interupting Doc... You have cancer

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Four blonds are driving to Disneyworld. They got in a crash and died.

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Three ethnic minorities walk into a bar, and each does something involving alcohol that confirms a negative stereotype about his subgroup.

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Your mamma used to be fat till Slim Fast came out with dick flavor!

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whats black red and white. a zebra with a contagious red rash

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What do an airplane and a grape have in common? They both have wings, except the grape.

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Whats white and sticky? Glue.

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why'd the monkey fall out of the tree? it was dead. why;d the banana fall out of the tree? it was stapled to the monkey.

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2 bald men are standing on an oval, one turns to the other and says "leukemia."

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What Did The Ocean Say To The Other Ocean? What? Nothing, They Just Waved. Oh. Did You Sea What I Did There? No. I'm Shore You Did.

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Knock Knock! Who is there? I am the milkman and I have your milk.

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Why can't the orphan play baseball? He can't find home.

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roses are black violets are black i am blind

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Justin Bieber tries to get into a club but is not allowed because he is to young.

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What's the difference between a picnic table and a Mexican? A picnic table can support a family of four.

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About numbers, it was 180 mg of valium... And I am going to live becausepeople got there in time, my heart never stopped because luck, the doc was only making a joke about me "having ingested enough valium to die at least twice". Sanders, I just got your girlfriend to agree to a threesome, if my banana ever wakes up again, AND WHEN... Thou areth forgiven, btw I sent him a picture of Line`s unshaved vagina, and a note stating: U recognize this? Find out more on horsehead network! Meh His name is Anders something Chattington, yeah for all that know him, guess whose finger is on her unshaven... Yeah, maybe you should not have messed with a guy that can have ANYONE. Ps: Then its your mother, then your sister which is 17 (and pretty 16 is legal here so fuck you Chatty!) and then I SHALL STRIKE THY WITH THE VENGEANCE OF A THOUSAND SUNS! Because you are forgiven, which I cant even remember what means, I mean I know I am typing my experiences here, but thats only because I remember by muscle memory where the buttons are, said the doctor... I can still play Snes emulators... Not, because my numb fingers cant click anything and Line is gone. I TOUCHED HER ALREADY YA KNO! YOU SAW THE PIC, My skin is tan, and... well you know she is here... The best part? She is totally okay with you knowing, sayonara pal, id watch the "fluor" in your mothers pussy the next time you eat it!

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Roses are blue, Violets are red, I have to go to the bathroom now...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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