- Mom, you have a banana in you ear. - What? Son I can't hear you, I have banana in my ear.

Why was the black guy sitting in the back of the bus? Because there were no more seats available in the front.

Two guys fight over a girl. The girl gets up from under them.

Three girls are walking in the woods they see tracks one thinks it is a bear the other thinks it is a deer the last one thinks it is a lion They all argue till they get hit by a train and realized they were train tracks

what did the guy say when he lost his sandwich? wheres my sandwich?

Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't. He flapped his wings, hovered, and the road crossed beneath him.

What do you call a black man flying a plane? A pilot, you racist bastard.

What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Cancer.

Roses are red, and many other colors too.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was a chicken and was probably not aware that it was walking across a road at all, especially considering that it was likely in a low-traffic rural area.

A blonde, wanting to earn some money, decided to hire herself out as a handyman-type and started canvassing a wealthy neighborhood. She went to the front door of the first house and asked the owner if he had any jobs for her to do. "Well, you can paint my porch. How much will you charge?" The blonde said, "How about 50 dollars?" The man agreed and told her that the paint and ladders that she might need were in the garage. The man's wife, inside the house, heard the conversation and said to her husband, "Does she realize that the porch goes all the way around the house?" The man replied, "She should. She was standing on the porch." A short time later, the blonde came to the door to collect her money, I forgot what happens right but it wasn't that funny anyway

What do you call someone with no arms, one leg,and an eye patch? names

What do you get if you convict a white man of murder? A black man in prison.

So, there's a black man, an Asian man and an Irishman who are in a bar, politely discussing wether the Asian's phone would break if it was thrown from a plane in the Pacific Ocean. The black man says "Of course it would break." The Irishman says "I have no opinion on this..." The Asian man says "I think it would break, you are right John." Suddenly, a man enters.

Knock Knock. Who's there? The police, your entire family died in a car accident. ... ... The police, your entire family died in a car accident who?

What do a tree and I have in common? We would both be mad if we got turned into paper.

Q: Why did Katie fall off the swing? A: She had no arms. Knock, Knock Who's There? Not Katie.

What did the hooker say to the black guy? How long do you want it for?

A man walks into a bar. He hits his head and dies.

Andoni was here

Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't, a car ran him over.

there was a lesbian, a bi-sexual and a homosexual at a wine bar having a drink.......They had a great night

A squirrel asks an apple where is the nearest gas station. The apple doesn't reply.

What's worse than finding ants in your kitchen? A truckload of dead babies.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...